Originally posted by Scottydog Thank you Jim once more, and Dan, no wounds. All my kids have been military one way or the other and I am prouder than hell of them. Dan you know, you and my daughter have something in common, the difference is you stay with your plane at all costs. This dopey broad jumped out of perfectly good flying aircraft and when I asked her why, she would give me a look and say, "Dad, I'm AIRBORNE." [/quote I feel bad about bringing it up. It may sound corny, but you and your family have done greater service and made greater sacrifice than most and it makes me honored to be in the company of such an outstanding American. God bless. btw....what possesses anyone to leap from a plane is beyond me. Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Monday, November 17, 2003 11:42 AM Time for MONDAY MADNESS . . . . . . [:)] I have a link to a picture for all to see today. It isn't a funny picture as such but it is interesting in the fact that when the circus (B & B) comes to a town they come in by train. The arena where they perform may be miles away. They have a convoy of wagons and animals to the arena. Some of you may have seen this. I don't know the history of this picture but it would not surprise me if this is an actual convoy of the circus to the arena or back to the train. http://www.top-greetings.com/N.py?P=20031116 I hope you all enjoy the picture. [:)] Edit Mookie Member sinceJune 2001 From: US 13,488 posts Posted by Mookie on Monday, November 17, 2003 12:47 PM Jim - they are heading to DQ for a peanut buster parfait! Mookie She who has no signature! cinscocom-tmw Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Monday, November 17, 2003 3:22 PM Jim I think i got it Thanks So thats what they call those Doctors in english! Edit Kathi Kube Member sinceDecember 2002 From: Waukesha, WI 271 posts Posted by Kathi Kube on Monday, November 17, 2003 4:28 PM Wow. So much to catch up on. First, to Scottydog: I don't think any amount of thanks can come close to being enough for the sacrifices you and your family have made, but my absolute respect and gratitude, at least, you have in abundance. Second, to Sask_Tinplater and Puckdropper: Oh, man. Serious groaners there! [:p] Jim, delightful ones in there. (Especially the one about exercising!) Mookie, quick on the uptake, eh? Watch a near-future issue of Trains for a story about the circus train. Very cool. Kevin, *sigh* Oy. I'm just shaking my head. To all: Have a nifty night; I'm headed home soon. Kathi Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Monday, November 17, 2003 6:15 PM [:D] i'm being sighed now by all the Women! Edit edblysard Member sinceMarch 2002 9,265 posts Posted by edblysard on Monday, November 17, 2003 6:54 PM You know, for a guy who has soooo much to say about the female anatomy.... Kinda makes you wonder about that boy! Ed 23 17 46 11 Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Monday, November 17, 2003 7:31 PM QUOTE: Originally posted by edblysard You know, for a guy who has soooo much to say about the female anatomy.... Kinda makes you wonder about that boy! Ed Ok Ed, When was the last time i picked, commented (outloud or in typing) on the female anatomy.. huh? HUH? whats that.. I Can't hear you!! [}:)][8D] [:D] AAAAHHH HAA! I thought the answer would be zero! Edit Puckdropper Member sinceDecember 2002 From: US 725 posts Posted by Puckdropper on Monday, November 17, 2003 8:14 PM Actually, you just did. (This is still the humor thread... I'm just picking on ya a bit) Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 1:56 AM Well now, for a while there I was carrying the humor load all by myself. Now everybody is getting into the act. Tonight has been a real hoot. Thanks all. [:D] Sometimes even the funnyman needs to laugh a little. [;)] Edit edblysard Member sinceMarch 2002 9,265 posts Posted by edblysard on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 5:17 AM Well, lets see. Besides the Hooters girls, there was a young lady I remember you saying that stepped out of a shower, bucky tail naked, and you fainted, and then there was the time.... Still gotta wonder about that one. Ha! back atcha... Stay Frosty, Ed 23 17 46 11 JoeKoh Member sinceApril 2003 From: Defiance Ohio 13,324 posts Posted by JoeKoh on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 7:07 AM correct me if I'm wrong but something about playing polar bear and camping?right kev?hmmmmm stay safe joe Deshler Ohio-crossroads of the B&O Matt eats your fries.YUM! Clinton st viaduct undefeated against too tall trucks!!!(voted to be called the "Clinton St. can opener"). Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 7:35 AM I wonder if native speakers find this one as amusing as a former long-time foreign student of English (myself) does? "EuroEnglish" The European Union commissioners have announced that agreement has been reached to adopt English as the preferred language for European communications, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year phased plan for what will be known as EuroEnglish (Euro for short). In the first year, 's' will be used instead of the soft 'c'. Sertainly, sivil servants will resieve this news with joy. Also, the hard 'c' will be replaced with 'k.' Not only will this klear up konfusion, but typewriters kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced by 'f'. This will make words like 'fotograf' 20 per sent shorter. In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of silent 'e's in the languag is disgrasful, and they would go. By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' by 'z' and 'w' by 'v'. During ze fifz year, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaining 'ou', and similar changes vud of kors; be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil b no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru. Just don't show this to Mr. Schwartzenegger. Yours truly, Oliver Edit Mookie Member sinceJune 2001 From: US 13,488 posts Posted by Mookie on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 7:42 AM Oliver - Perfect timing! Mook She who has no signature! cinscocom-tmw Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 7:53 AM People in other countries sometimes go out of their way to communicate with their English-speaking tourists. Here is a list of signs seen around the world. How cute! Cocktail lounge, Norway: LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR. At a Budapest zoo: PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY. Doctors office, Rome: SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES. Hotel, Acapulco: THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED HERE. Information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner, Japan: COOLES AND HEATES: IF YOU WANT CONDITION OF WARM AIR IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF. Car rental brochure, Tokyo: WHEN PASSENGER OF FOOT HEAVE IN SIGHT, TOOTLE THE HORN. TRUMPET HIM MELODIOUSLY AT FIRST, BUT IF HE STILL OBSTACLES YOUR PASSAGE THEN TOOTLE HIM WITH VIGOUR. Sign in men's rest room in Japan: TO STOP LEAK TURN **** TO THE RIGHT. In a Nairobi restaurant: CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER. On the grounds of a private school: NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION. On an Athi River highway: TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE. On a poster at Kencom: ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP. In a City restaurant: OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO. One of the Mathare buildings: MENTAL HEALTH PREVENTION CENTRE. A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer: DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS. In a Pumwani maternity ward: NO CHILDREN ALLOWED. In a cemetery PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES. Sign in Japanese public bath: FOREIGN GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO PULL **** IN TUB. Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations: GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED. On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR. In a Tokyo bar: SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS. In a Bangkok temple: IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN EVEN A FOREIGNER IF DRESSED AS A MAN. Hotel room notice, Chiang-Mai, Thailand: PLEASE DO NOT BRING SOLICITORS INTO YOUR ROOM. Hotel brochure, Italy: THIS HOTEL IS RENOWNED FOR ITS PEACE AND SOLITUDE. IN FACT, CROWDS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD FLOCK HERE TO ENJOY ITS SOLITUDE. Hotel lobby, Bucharest: THE LIFT IS BEING FIXED FOR THE NEXT DAY. DURING THAT TIME WE REGRET THAT YOU WILL BE UNBEARABLE. Hotel elevator, Paris: PLEASE LEAVE YOUR VALUES AT THE FRONT DESK. Hotel, Yugoslavia: THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID. Hotel, Japan: YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY. Hotel catering to skiers, Austria: NOT TO PERAMBULATE THE CORRIDORS IN THE HOURS OF REPOSE IN THE BOOTS OF ASCENSION. Taken from a menu, Poland: SALAD A FIRM'S OWN MAKE; LIMPID RED BEET SOUP WITH CHEESY DUMPLINGS IN THE FORM OF A FINGER; ROASTED DUCK LET LOOSE; BEEF RASHERS BEATEN IN THE COUNTRY PEOPLE'S FASHION. Supermarket, Hong Kong: FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE, WE RECOMMEND COURTEOUS, EFFICIENT SELF-SERVICE. From the "Soviet Weekly": THERE WILL BE A MOSCOW EXHIBITION OF ARTS BY 15,000 SOVIET REPUBLIC PAINTERS AND SCULPTORS. THESE WERE EXECUTED OVER THE PAST TWO YEARS. In an East African newspaper: A NEW SWIMMING POOL IS RAPIDLY TAKING SHAPE SINCE THE CONTRACTORS HAVE THROWN IN THE BULK OF THEIR WORKERS. Hotel, Vienna: IN CASE OF FIRE, DO YOUR UTMOST TO ALARM THE HOTEL PORTER. A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest: IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE. Hotel, Zurich: BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE. An advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS. A laundry in Rome: LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME. Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia: TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS. WE GUARANTEE NO MISCARRIAGES. Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand: WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ***? The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong: GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE. In a Swiss mountain inn: SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM. Airline ticket office, Copenhagen: WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS. On the door of a Moscow hotel room: IF THIS IS YOUR FIRST VISIT TO THE USSR, YOU ARE WELCOME TO IT. You see? You are welcome wherever you go! Edit Kathi Kube Member sinceDecember 2002 From: Waukesha, WI 271 posts Posted by Kathi Kube on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 9:05 AM Oh, my gosh, Oliver! Those are too funny! (And kinda scary at the same time!) How long have you been speaking English? You write it very well—far better than some Americans do, that's for sure! And what was the hardest part about learning English? Just nosy. Kathi [:D] Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 9:58 AM OK, another pic for today. [:)] Something tells me this one WON'T make Bergie's Pic of the Day. [:D] Did someone call a plummer? [:D] DON'T LOOK ETHYL. [:D] [}:)] [8D] [;)] HERE WE GO . . . . . . http://www.top-greetings.com/N.py?P=20031117 Ethyl YOU LOOKED. [8D] Edit Mookie Member sinceJune 2001 From: US 13,488 posts Posted by Mookie on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 12:57 PM QUOTE: Originally posted by jhhtrainsplanes OK, another pic for today. [:)] Something tells me this one WON'T make Bergie's Pic of the Day. [:D] Did someone call a plummer? [:D] DON'T LOOK ETHYL. [:D] [}:)] [8D] [;)] HERE WE GO . . . . . . http://www.top-greetings.com/N.py?P=20031117 Ethyl YOU LOOKED. [8D] [}:)] Mookie did too! Now she has a wrinkle in her whiskers! She who has no signature! cinscocom-tmw JoeKoh Member sinceApril 2003 From: Defiance Ohio 13,324 posts Posted by JoeKoh on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 3:26 PM They make caulk for that kind of problem! stay safe Joe Deshler Ohio-crossroads of the B&O Matt eats your fries.YUM! Clinton st viaduct undefeated against too tall trucks!!!(voted to be called the "Clinton St. can opener"). Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 4:46 PM The first time I took my wife to London she was all excited and didn't care who knew it. On checking into our hotel, she was bubbling over about all the exciting things she was going to see the next day and was telling all this to the counter clerk as I was registering, she told him she wanted an early start. After he had chatted with her for a minute or two about the sights of London, he said, "Then Madam. What time would you like to be knocked up in the morning?" Her stunned face was a treat to see. Somebody had finally shut her up since getting on the plane in Chicago. What a time I had explaining that was the British expression for a wakeup call. Edit edblysard Member sinceMarch 2002 9,265 posts Posted by edblysard on Tuesday, November 18, 2003 8:51 PM I want to know what all those plumbers are doing to that airship! The pipes cant be that clogged! Ed[:D] 23 17 46 11 Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, November 19, 2003 1:29 AM It is Wednesday and time for . . . . . . . Hump Day Helpers [8D] This poem has been around for years. You might have seen it before. It reminds us that we are safe because of the guys and gals who risk their lives for our freedom. Thank you to all our service people. You have our gratitude. > > > THE FOLLOWING POEM AND REMARKS AT THE BOTTOM WERE > > > SENT TO ME BY A FRIEND. PLEASE READ AND PASS ON TO > > > OTHERS. THANKS > > > > > > > > > Subject: CHRISTMAS POEM ( WRITTEN BY A SOLDIER) > > > > > > TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, > > > HE LIVED ALL ALONE, > > > IN A ONE BEDROOM HOUSE MADE OF > > > PLASTER AND STONE. > > > > > > I HAD COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY > > > WITH PRESENTS TO GIVE, > > > AND TO SEE JUST WHO > > > IN THIS HOME DID LIVE. > > > > > > I LOOKED ALL ABOUT, > > > A STRANGE SIGHT I DID SEE, > > > NO TINSEL, NO PRESENTS, > > > NOT EVEN A TREE. > > > > > > NO STOCKING BY MANTLE, > > > JUST BOOTS FILLED WITH SAND, > > > ON THE WALL HUNG PICTURES > > > OF FAR DISTANT LANDS. > > > > > > WITH MEDALS AND BADGES, > > > AWARDS OF ALL KINDS, > > > A SOBER THOUGHT > > > CAME THROUGH MY MIND. > > > > > > FOR THIS HOUSE WAS DIFFERENT, > > > IT WAS DARK AND DREARY, > > > I FOUND THE HOME OF A SOLDIER, > > > ONCE I COULD SEE CLEARLY. > > > > > > THE SOLDIER LAY SLEEPING, > > > SILENT, ALONE, > > > CURLED UP ON THE FLOOR > > > IN THIS ONE BEDROOM HOME. > > > > > > THE FACE WAS SO GENTLE, > > > THE ROOM IN SUCH DISORDER, > > > NOT HOW I PICTURED > > > A UNITED STATES SOLDIER. > > > > > > WAS THIS THE HERO > > > OF WHOM I'D JUST READ? > > > CURLED UP ON A PONCHO, > > > THE FLOOR FOR A BED? > > > > > > I REALIZED THE FAMILIES > > > THAT I SAW THIS NIGHT, > > > OWED THEIR LIVES TO THESE SOLDIERS > > > WHO WERE WILLING TO FIGHT. > > > > > > SOON ROUND THE WORLD, > > > THE CHILDREN WOULD PLAY, > > > AND GROWNUPS WOULD CELEBRATE > > > A BRIGHT CHRISTMAS DAY. > > > > > > THEY ALL ENJOYED FREEDOM > > > EACH MONTH OF THE YEAR, > > > BECAUSE OF THE SOLDIERS, > > > LIKE THE ONE LYING HERE. > > > > > > I COULDN'T HELP WONDER > > > HOW MANY LAY ALONE, > > > ON A COLD CHRISTMAS EVE > > > IN A LAND FAR FROM HOME. > > > > > > THE VERY THOUGHT > > > BROUGHT A TEAR TO MY EYE, > > > I DROPPED TO MY KNEES > > > AND STARTED TO CRY. > > > > > > THE SOLDIER AWAKENED > > > AND I HEARD A ROUGH VOICE, > > > "SANTA DON'T CRY, > > > THIS LIFE IS MY CHOICE; > > > > > > I FIGHT FOR FREEDOM, > > > I DON'T ASK FOR MORE, > > > MY LIFE IS MY GOD, > > > MY COUNTRY, MY CORPS." > > > > > > THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER > > > AND DRIFTED TO SLEEP, > > > I COULDN'T CONTROL IT, > > > I CONTINUED TO WEEP. > > > > > > I KEPT WATCH FOR HOURS, > > > SO SILENT AND STILL > > > AND WE BOTH SHIVERED > > > FROM THE COLD NIGHT'S CHILL. > > > > > > I DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE > > > ON THAT COLD, DARK, NIGHT, > > > THIS GUARDIAN OF HONOR > > > SO WILLING TO FIGHT. > > > > > > THEN THE SOLDIER ROLLED OVER, > > > WITH A VOICE SOFT AND PURE, > > > WHISPERED, "CARRY ON SANTA, > > > IT'S CHRISTMAS DAY, ALL IS SECURE." > > > > > > ONE LOOK AT MY WATCH, > > > AND I KNEW HE WAS RIGHT. > > > "MERRY CHRISTMAS MY FRIEND, > > > AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT." > > > > > > This poem was written by a Marine stationed in > > > Okinawa Japan. The following is his request. I think it is > > > reasonable..... > > > > > > PLEASE. Would you do me the kind favor of sending > > > this to as many people as you can? Christmas will > > > be coming soon and some credit is due to our U.S. service > > > men and women for our being able to celebrate these festivities. > > > Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what we owe. > > > Make people stop and think of our heroes, living > > > and dead, who sacrificed themselves for us. Please, > > > do your small part to plant this small seed. Edit Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, November 19, 2003 4:15 AM QUOTE: Originally posted by Kathi Kube Oh, my gosh, Oliver! Those are too funny! (And kinda scary at the same time!) How long have you been speaking English? You write it very well—far better than some Americans do, that's for sure! And what was the hardest part about learning English? Just nosy. Kathi [:D] Hi, Kathi! I'm glad you like the funnies. And about me and the English language - it all started back in 1974, in the fourth grade of the elementary school - I was 8 then. And we had a teacher who made us write every new word we learned five times for homework, together with the International Phonetic Alphabet spelling and the Croatian translation of the word. It may sound a little drastic, but it was efficient. So it's 4 years in the elementary, 4 years secondary, plus 4 years college (I studied English and French languages and literature... and O.K., it actually lasted 6 years, and I came close to finishing it, but...), and I'm still learning thanks to Model Railroader and Trains magazines, music, books, movies, the Internet (this forum mostly because I don't have the time to surf too much), etc. The hardest part to me was when I was required to theoretically explain grammar (the sequence or formation of tenses, for instance), but I had far less problems with the practical use of the language. OK, now I already feel a little uncomfortable writing without my dictionaries by my side. Best regards, Oliver. Edit JoeKoh Member sinceApril 2003 From: Defiance Ohio 13,324 posts Posted by JoeKoh on Wednesday, November 19, 2003 9:17 AM Ok brillant timing a guy in Ft wayne went to rob a bank at 923 am .problem is the bank didnt open until 930.So the tellers had plenty of time to get a description of the robber the getaway car and lic #.so therfore the guy is charged with attemted robbery w/gun specifacation.lesson timing(as in telling jokes) is everything. stay safe Joe Deshler Ohio-crossroads of the B&O Matt eats your fries.YUM! Clinton st viaduct undefeated against too tall trucks!!!(voted to be called the "Clinton St. can opener"). Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, November 20, 2003 12:38 AM Next edition of the humor thread paper . . . . . . . . . [:p] One Sunday a cowboy went to church. When he entered, he saw that he and the preacher were the only ones present. The preacher asked the cowboy if he wanted him to go ahead and preach. The cowboy said, "I'm not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I'd feed him." So the minister began his sermon. One hour passed, then two hours, then two-and-a-half hours. The preacher finally finished and came down to ask the cowboy how he liked the sermon. The cowboy answered slowly, "Well, I'm not very smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I sure wouldn't feed him all the hay." This one I have seen before. I hope I am not repeating it. If so you can just laugh at me instead of the joke. [:D] [:D] [:D] Edit vsmith Member sinceDecember 2001 From: Smoggy L.A. 10,743 posts Posted by vsmith on Thursday, November 20, 2003 12:32 PM Came across this one recently, Dont know if its true but its a heck of a good story... His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog. There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death. The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse surroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved. "I want to repay you," said the nobleman. "You saved my son's life." "No, I can't accept payment for what I did," the Scottish farmer replied waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel. "Is that your son?" the nobleman asked. "Yes," the farmer replied proudly. "I'll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education my own son will enjoy. If the lad is anything like his father, he'll no doubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of." And that he did. Farmer Fleming's son attended the very best schools and in time, graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin. Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog was stricken with pneumonia. What saved his life this time? Penicillin. The name of the nobleman? Lord Randolph Churchill. His son's name? Sir Winston Churchill. Someone once said: What goes around comes around. Have fun with your trains Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, November 20, 2003 7:27 PM QUOTE: Originally posted by edblysard Well, lets see. Besides the Hooters girls, there was a young lady I remember you saying that stepped out of a shower, bucky tail naked, and you fainted, and then there was the time.... Still gotta wonder about that one. Ha! back atcha... Stay Frosty, Ed THE FIFTH!!! I PLEAD THE FIFTH!! [:D] [:D] [:D] i'm really not a naughty boy Edit dharmon Member sinceAugust 2003 From: Bottom Left Corner, USA 3,420 posts Posted by dharmon on Thursday, November 20, 2003 8:11 PM QUOTE: Originally posted by kevinstheRRman QUOTE: Originally posted by edblysard Well, lets see. Besides the Hooters girls, there was a young lady I remember you saying that stepped out of a shower, bucky tail naked, and you fainted, and then there was the time.... Still gotta wonder about that one. Ha! back atcha... Stay Frosty, Ed THE FIFTH!!! I PLEAD THE FIFTH!! [:D] [:D] [:D] Nice try...you're Canadian.....no fifth Amendment for you[:D][:D]Now a fifth of somehting else maybe........[:D][:D] i'm really not a naughty boy Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Friday, November 21, 2003 1:25 AM And now the day that everyone is waiting for -- F R I D A Y. [8D] [:)] [;)] So that mean this is the . . . . . Finally Friday edition of our humor thread paper. yea, yea. [:D] Three Hunters: Three hunters in the north woods entered a little cabin where they found shelter and something to eat. The cabin was ordinary except thatthe stove was suspended from the rafters by a series of wires. This odd arrangement became the object of discussion, and various theories were advanced. One man was the engineer and expounded on thermodynamics and how a suspended stove would affect the heating of the room. Another hunter was a psychologist, and he was sure that the stove was suspended, so that the owner could crawl under it in a fetal position and thus experience the warmth and security of his mother's womb. The third hunter was a minister, and he declared that the stove was suspended because of the ancient belief in fire and the altar worship. Each was quite convinced he had solved the mystery of the suspended stove. When the owner came back, they asked him about it. "It's really quite simple," he explained, "I had plenty of wire but not enough pipe." Edit Anonymous Member sinceApril 2003 305,205 posts Posted by Anonymous on Friday, November 21, 2003 1:43 PM WOW Dan is on the ball! I really can't plead the fifth because i'm Canadian.. Oh well, this site is American based SO technically i was typing those things in America! SO I Can plead the fifth! So does my obscure view on justice fly? Edit « First«78910111213»Last » Join our Community! Our community is FREE to join. To participate you must either login or register for an account. Login » Register » Search the Community Newsletter Sign-Up By signing up you may also receive occasional reader surveys and special offers from Trains magazine.Please view our privacy policy More great sites from Kalmbach Media Terms Of Use | Privacy Policy | Copyright Policy
She who has no signature! cinscocom-tmw
23 17 46 11
QUOTE: Originally posted by edblysard You know, for a guy who has soooo much to say about the female anatomy.... Kinda makes you wonder about that boy! Ed
Deshler Ohio-crossroads of the B&O Matt eats your fries.YUM! Clinton st viaduct undefeated against too tall trucks!!!(voted to be called the "Clinton St. can opener").
QUOTE: Originally posted by jhhtrainsplanes OK, another pic for today. [:)] Something tells me this one WON'T make Bergie's Pic of the Day. [:D] Did someone call a plummer? [:D] DON'T LOOK ETHYL. [:D] [}:)] [8D] [;)] HERE WE GO . . . . . . http://www.top-greetings.com/N.py?P=20031117 Ethyl YOU LOOKED. [8D]
QUOTE: Originally posted by Kathi Kube Oh, my gosh, Oliver! Those are too funny! (And kinda scary at the same time!) How long have you been speaking English? You write it very well—far better than some Americans do, that's for sure! And what was the hardest part about learning English? Just nosy. Kathi [:D]
Have fun with your trains
QUOTE: Originally posted by edblysard Well, lets see. Besides the Hooters girls, there was a young lady I remember you saying that stepped out of a shower, bucky tail naked, and you fainted, and then there was the time.... Still gotta wonder about that one. Ha! back atcha... Stay Frosty, Ed
QUOTE: Originally posted by kevinstheRRman QUOTE: Originally posted by edblysard Well, lets see. Besides the Hooters girls, there was a young lady I remember you saying that stepped out of a shower, bucky tail naked, and you fainted, and then there was the time.... Still gotta wonder about that one. Ha! back atcha... Stay Frosty, Ed THE FIFTH!!! I PLEAD THE FIFTH!! [:D] [:D] [:D] Nice try...you're Canadian.....no fifth Amendment for you[:D][:D]Now a fifth of somehting else maybe........[:D][:D] i'm really not a naughty boy
Our community is FREE to join. To participate you must either login or register for an account.