Kudos to Dave Vollmer for coming up with "Classic Model Railroading" (see under thread about high cost of hobby). Dave is a highly creative individual. I don't know about you, but I would pay good Monopoly money to see a monthly using Dave's ideas.
Along those lines, it occurred to me that we could actually prevent the predicted death of the hobby by making it even more entertaining. So entertaining, perhaps, that even non-modelers would get a kick out it and pay good money for that entertainment.
Here are some ideas:
The Amazing Scratchbuilders - a "reality" show where people vie for prizes and try to screw over the competition.
Kitbashing With The Stars - Sort of like Dancing With The Stars, but using Walthers Built-Ups and Cornerstone models.
The Scenery Whisperer - Cesar Milan gives up dogs to show you how to get scenery materials to behave properly.
Access Kalmbach - A variation of Access Hollywood, only it's a gossip show about MR staffers.
The Weekly World Hobby News - A tabloid that reports on such things as garden railroads on the moon and how PCM models are actually built on one of the lesser satellites of Neptune.
Model Railroading Mythbusters - That's my show. I have dibs. The whole idea is to debunk popular myths about the hobby. If I'm going to do that, I might as well get paid (handsomely) for it.
The Model Railroader Apprentice - A group of people vie to get a coveted job with Kalmbach Publishing and avoid the dreaded words - "Your trains are toy-like, you're fired!!!" We do need to find a Kalmbach staffer with a bad comb-over to make the hire/fire decisions.
Extreme Makeover Layout Edition - Lance Mindheim and his crew rip up poorly designed Plywood Pacific 4x8's and build amazingly detailed and superbly operating layouts in specially designed buildings roughly the size of Houston's Astrodome.
America's Next Top Modeler - Scantily clad newbie model railroaders parade their skills (or lack of same) in front of experienced model railroaders in hopes of earning the title "America's Next Top Modeler". The swim suit portion of the contest counts for 50% of the points earned.
Dream It, Plan It, Screw It Up Royally - A new series of DVD's for the neophyte in all of us that catalogs the innumerable ways to make things go wrong in a spectacular fashion.
C.S.I. Waukesha. A show by Kalmbach forensic layout experts that starts out with really crappy layouts and discovers who actually built the things.
Well that's all for now.
Ta ta.
Andre
andrechapelon wrote: Kudos to Dave Vollmer for coming up with "Classic Model Railroading" Dream It, Plan It, Screw It Up Royally - A new series of DVD's for the neophyte in all of us that catalogs the innumerable ways to make things go wrong in a spectacular fashion.C.S.I. Waukesha. A show by Kalmbach forensic layout experts that starts out with really crappy layouts and discovers who actually built the things.
Kudos to Dave Vollmer for coming up with "Classic Model Railroading"
Andre,
I'm up way too late but these two get my vote..
Guy
see stuff at: the Willoughby Line Site
Bob Berger, C.O.O. N-ovation & Northwestern R.R. My patio layout....SEE IT HERE
There's no place like ~/ ;)
Classic thread. I loved your ideas.
Magnus
You left one out:
Dirty Rails - in search of the dirtiest, most non-conductive and corroded trackwork.
Empire under construction !
The early bird catches the worm.
But, the second mouse gets the cheese!
I did the Classic Model Railroading thing more as a parody for the "back in my day" and "the hobby is dying" crowds.
On that note,
Modeling the Rio Grande Southern First District circa 1938-1946 in HOn3.
Bob Boudreau
CANADA
Visit my model railroad photography website: http://sites.google.com/site/railphotog/
Stargate SD-40 - Modellers discover a hyperspace portal where they can send empty hopper cars in and get full hopper cars back.
America's Funniest Train Videos - Culled from the web pages of You Tube, contestants vie for prizes with poor track work and really bad, out-of-scale scenery.
Antique Trains Roadshow - People with dreams of untold riches are disappointed to find the value of those Tyco engines they found in the attic.
Rambergie - A tough, no-nonsense combat veteran takes on Evil Al to keep America's train forums running smoothly.
It takes an iron man to play with a toy iron horse.
You have to love that US/Canadian price difference on the cover.
I am working on the following articles for Classic Model Railroading:
In Defense of 6 volt HO.
Outside Third Rail - It Just Looks Better
Why Waiting 3 Weeks for Kodachrome is Worth It.
The Horn Hook -- the Hobby's Gift to Beginners
Making Your Snap Switch Machines Sound More Realistic
But before I get too smug I guess I should admit that I do still run some paper sides from the 1930s and 40s and, yeah, I think they look pretty good! Almost as good as the Varney steel lithographed cars .....
Dave Nelson
Don't forget:
Paper: It was good enough for E.L. Moore, it's good enough for you
Dave Vollmer wrote: I did the Classic Model Railroading thing more as a parody for the "back in my day" and "the hobby is dying" crowds.
LOL Dave... Your mag reminds me of that Dana Carvey character on SNL....
"Back in my day, we wittled our own ties out of firewood, and we wittled until our fingers bled, and we LIKED it."
Dave Vollmer, you are da MAN!!!
That TYCO "Silver Streak" is just what this hobby needs to get it out of its currently moribund state.
MisterBeasley wrote: Stargate SD-40 - Modellers discover a hyperspace portal where they can send empty hopper cars in and get full hopper cars back.America's Funniest Train Videos - Culled from the web pages of You Tube, contestants vie for prizes with poor track work and really bad, out-of-scale scenery.Antique Trains Roadshow - People with dreams of untold riches are disappointed to find the value of those Tyco engines they found in the attic.Rambergie - A tough, no-nonsense combat veteran takes on Evil Al to keep America's train forums running smoothly.
Antique Trains Roadshow. What a concept. In the first episode, some clown tries to sell for $5000 a genyoowine 1966 SD-45 that his dad bought for him only to be told that it's actually only worth a buck and a half. He then threatens to sue the show for defamation of "classicness".
Here's another one: eBay Watch. David Hasselhof and Pamela Anderson rescue hobby newbies from the clutches of unscrupulous eBay sellers.
How about "Trading Layout Spaces"? Each week people spend several days working on someone else's layout, often causing the original owner to consider homicide.
Then there's "Bunk". An OCD modeler is constantly straightening up other people's layout rooms while trying to figure out where the layout owner went wrong building his layout. Adrian Bunk fears lichen, Floquil, ground foam, extruded foam, cork roadbed, Walthers, ready-to-run, brass engines, airbrushes, L-girder construction. You get the picture.
Another show would be the Model Railroad Wright - making them like they did in the good old days with tin cans and shirt board.
Enjoy
Paul
Tic-Tac-Ties:
(edit) or better yet: Click - Clack - Ties:
featuring forum members in the "loops" and "crossovers"...
Does anyone still have those Mantua hook-and-hoop couplers left over? Compare with today's Kadees.
You may then agree that there have been many improvements to the hobby over the years once you make such a comparison.
Compare electronics and locomotive mechanisms, too. You may reach the same conclusion.
I do, however, appreciate the humor in this thread. Also, there is a valid point to be made. It's much more rewarding to make your models than to just own them. We are modelers more than we are collectors.
Happy Model Railroading.
GARRY
HEARTLAND DIVISION, CB&Q RR
EVERYWHERE LOST; WE HUSTLE OUR CABOOSE FOR YOU
Soldering pencils are for sissies. Use Grampaw's old arc welder and butch up a bit.
HO scale power lines on a shoe-string - with shoe string. Leave lycra in your wimmin's underthings where it belongs.
G scale on a 4X8 - uncharted territory just begging to be found.
To all of the above, I have but one comment!
!!!!
What a thread to read before I have my coffee! Might even get me to turn on the TV again.
Just one question. In America's New Top Model Railroaders, do the modelers get to wear the swimsuits, or are you going to stock the scene with bikini-fillers to serve as distractions? (Guaranteed winner - a manually dexterous young lady who can build a decent model and BE a decent model simultaneously. I've known several.)
Still ROFLMAO!
Chuck (modeling Central Japan in September, 1964 - NOT in a swimsuit!)
How about "As the Rivet Turns" - a Cross-Fire like argument between self-proclaimed authorities over whether a given model is accurate enough to win the coveted Joshua Cowen Lionel award for prototype accuracy.
Or "The Gong Show" where decoder sound samples are played to determine fidelity to prototype whistle, chuff, and prime mover sounds. Judges will be selected by audience voting from their performances on "As the Rivet Turns".
That's funny about G scale on a 4X8!
..... or was that 4 yards by 8 yards?
..... or 4 football fields by 8 football fields?
Or about the Versed Support Group.
You know the ones who manually install rail joiners bolt by bolt on every 39 feet of rail.
Then go forth to tell us all that is the required track standard for the entire hobby resulting in trainsets being packaged with 39 foot rail, ties and HO scale sized MOW tools and spikes.
I'm beginning to worry about Vollmer. Soon he'll be collecting gourds that resemble U.S. presidents.
Dave Vollmer wrote:
In future issues:How to pour lead weights on your stove top
Bowser, and why broken toes build character
Fiber ties - Switching to narrow gauge out of necessity
101 uses for Zamac dust
Green lint, rubber cement, and a box fan - flock up your railroad in 5 minutes flat
Nelson
Ex-Southern 385 Being Hoisted
Dan
AltonFan wrote:The Old Yankee Model Railroad Workshop: A show demonstrating how model railroaders can build anything with a fully-stocked workshop equipped with over $2 Million worth of machine tools, woodworking equipment, CAD machinery, etc. etc.
Heh...Nice One!
I cant believe no one has mentioned the show popular with the youngsters:
"PIMP MY LAYOUT!"
Who says you cant put spinners on a consolidation!
For the "franchise" you also need the article: "Snap track is for sissies...Why Real Men Lay by Their Own Hand."
Chuck
jdtractorboy wrote: AltonFan wrote:The Old Yankee Model Railroad Workshop: A show demonstrating how model railroaders can build anything with a fully-stocked workshop equipped with over $2 Million worth of machine tools, woodworking equipment, CAD machinery, etc. etc.Heh...Nice One! I cant believe no one has mentioned the show popular with the youngsters:"PIMP MY LAYOUT!"Who says you cant put spinners on a consolidation! For the "franchise" you also need the article: "Snap track is for sissies...Why Real Men Lay by Their Own Hand." Chuck
.....or "Trick My Track", where the unsuspecting model railroader's wife has arranged for his entire layout to be retro-fitted to DC, including a chrome control panel, marquis racing LED's and gold-plated toggle switches. To add to the sleekness, all wiring is in black and the sound has been locked in at 130dB, for that "real diesel" sound.
For the "tagline" you could also paraphrase that old MR standby: Model Railroading WAS Fun!
Tom
tomikawaTT wrote: Just one question. In America's New Top Model Railroaders, do the modelers get to wear the swimsuits, or are you going to stock the scene with bikini-fillers to serve as distractions? (Guaranteed winner - a manually dexterous young lady who can build a decent model and BE a decent model simultaneously. I've known several.)
There IS a precedent for this - ever looked at magazines for flying model aircraft? They usually have one or two scantily clad young woman holding or standing near a model aircraft. I always wondered if they really built that model!
Speaking of humor, anyone remember the issue of MR parodied by The Onion a few years ago?
Atlas' current locos are garbage. They need to go back to basics and make quality products like this again: ATLAS TURBO RACER
Spinners on a...
[Retches...]
Dave & Andre, You guys are the best. What a hoot this has been.
I would like to add this to your list as well, How about, "Rosie the Rivet Counter"
MC'd by Rosie O'Donnell, Those rivet counters in our hobby are asked to take any given model presented to them and in a measured period of time, detect whether it is an accurate model or not. The losers will be required to make home made ground foam for the whole audience. The winners will get a trip to their LHS with a gift certificate or maybe just supper at the Diner.
Johnboy out.......................
James:1 Verse:5.
The "Wobbly" is wobbling well.
from Saskatchewan, in the Great White North..
We have met the enemy, and he is us............ (Pogo)