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How to get your puchases of trains past your spouse

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How to get your puchases of trains past your spouse
Posted by alexweiihman on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 2:37 PM
How do you get your puchases of trains past your spouse
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Posted by dougdagrump on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 2:50 PM

I don't try, she is very supportive of my hobby.

Besides if you do that it could result in a trip to divorce court where she could end up with half your empire. Smile,Wink, & Grin [swg]

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Posted by johnandjulie13 on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 3:07 PM

I routinely check all of our credit card charges on-line.  Given the large amount of Christmas related purchases, I was reviewing the charges this morning.  I came across a charge from Valley Farms for over $700.00 and I was seething as I thought, "Geez!  Now what did my wife waste money on?"  So, I called her up and asked her what the charge was for.  To which she responded "Don't you remember?  Valley Farms is the hobby store you purchased those PRR diesel engines from since none of the local stores still had them."  I sheepishly replied, "Thanks, Sweetie, I have to get back to work now."

Heaven forbid if I was trying to hide that purchase from her!

Regards,

John O

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Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 3:07 PM
LOL!  Most of my purchases are supported.  Only rarely do I not tell her about them... my latest being one such purchase.  Once she sees it in action she will approve, so I'm not worried. Whistling [:-^]
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Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 3:08 PM
 johnandjulie13 wrote:

I routinely check all of our credit card charges on-line.  Given the large amount of Christmas related purchases, I was reviewing the charges this morning.  I came across a charge from Valley Farms for over $700.00 and I was seething as I thought, "Geez!  Now what did my wife waste money on?"  So, I called her up and asked her what the charge was for.  To which she responded "Don't you remember?  Valley Farms is the hobby store you purchased those PRR diesel engines from since none of the local stores still had them."  I sheepishly replied, "Thanks, Sweetie, I have to get back to work now."

Heaven forbid if I was trying to hide that purchase from her!

Regards,

John O

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Posted by Deputy on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 3:47 PM

ALL my purchases come via US Mail (pick up at Post Office) or UPS. My wife works so she's never home when they arrive. But I keep all my train stuff in her computer room. So she is aware of everything I have. She has no complaints and I love her for that. Smile [:)]

Dep 

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Posted by spankybird on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 4:42 PM

Smile,Wink, & Grin [swg]Every train engine cost me two dolls. As of now, she is up 3 engines.

 

 

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Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 4:51 PM

If you have to sneak things past your spouse, or otherwise disguise what you've bought, you're in the wrong marriage for a good number of reasons. But that should come as no surprise, given the casual way marriage is often treated in our society these days.

 It also signifies that you're a big whimp! Smile [:)]

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Posted by otftch on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 4:52 PM

I don't try to hide my purchases.My wife totally supports my trains AND my model airplanes.Like she says "it keeps me out of Bars".It was also nice as the kids were growing up,to be there if I was needed and my kids know more about trains and airplanes than most.Both of my boys taught aircraft recognition in the services.

                                                            Ed

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Posted by jonadel on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 5:04 PM

I was not going to involved in this question as it's been beat to death on another forum but I do have one question?

 Allan, are you married?

Jon

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Posted by dwiemer on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 5:37 PM
 otftch wrote:

I don't try to hide my purchases.My wife totally supports my trains AND my model airplanes.Like she says "it keeps me out of Bars".It was also nice as the kids were growing up,to be there if I was needed and my kids know more about trains and airplanes than most.Both of my boys taught aircraft recognition in the services.

                                                            Ed

Ed, mine has said the same thing.  It keeps me occupied and she knows where I am at.  She also supports it as the kids have learned a lot and it keeps us all playing together as a family.

Dennis

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Posted by daan on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 5:51 PM
 dougdagrump wrote:

I don't try, she is very supportive of my hobby.

Besides if you do that it could result in a trip to divorce court where she could end up with half your empire. Smile,Wink, & Grin [swg]

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Posted by okiechoochoo on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 6:10 PM
My wife knows about every purchase BEFORE I buy it.  I don't think hiding things in marriages is a healthy thing to do.

All Lionel all the time.

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Posted by Frank53 on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 7:23 PM

Likewise. My wife really enjoys the project. Peeking around the layout to see what progress I made in the middle of the previous night is one of the first things she does in the morning. She's been threatening to start making building the trees for a while now, but her health is so bad, she hasn't had the energy.

I have a limited number of actual train purchases in my future, as there are only so many post war engines in which I have interest. At some point in this adventure, I'll pick up a 746, a post War FM Trainmaster - probably of the Lackawanna variety, a set of 2242 New Havens, and 209 New Havens.

I still have my eye on a few post war passenger sets, and am always on the lookout for New York Central, Pennsylvania and New Haven rolling stock. Beyond those, I don't see myself buying many trains.

My wife has poured over the David Doyle book picking out stuff she likes that she thinks would be "cool" on the layout, and couldn't be more supportive.

as an aisde, this thread is getting quite a different set of responses here than where it usually appears.

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Posted by Smoke Stack Lightnin' on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 8:19 PM

I've seen this or similar questions on forums and am amazed at the overwhelming majority of supportive wives.  My wife hates the hobby, hates trains, even hates me watching train videos.  I'm sure there must be some wives/significant others out here that are non-supportive.  I can relate to Alex's question.  I am guilty of quickly unpackaging and blending stuff in.  Call me a wimp, but I've been married 40 years to the same woman, love my wife, can afford what I purchase, but simply don't want to endure adding fuel to the fire.  Alex- If you aren't hurting your finances or causing harm otherwise, you just got to learn not to burn, and always have an explaination ready.  You don't have to lie, but you don't have to volunteer the entire truth!  Stores always have sales, maybe not on trains, but hey... 

Good Luck 

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Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 8:26 PM

I try not to make any type of major purchase without my wife knowing...

How does that saying go...  Better to ask for permission than to ask for forgiveness OR is that the other way around?Angel [angel]

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Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 8:35 PM
Smoke Stack Lightnin'

That was how my ex-wife was.  We had an arguement once and I told her, 'I'll stop buying trains when you stop buying make-up, shoes, and clothes in every color.  Model Railroading is my hobby, I don't go to bars and liquor up, I don't go to strip clubs and oogle naked women, this hobby lets me incorporate every one of my life long loves, art, construction, architecture, research, trains, everything.  So if you want me to give it up you can forget it.'  We had a lot of problems and trains gave me a bit of an escape.  It wasn't long after this that we divorced and I was able to REALLY enjoy this hobby again.

I am now remarried to a woman that supports this hobby.  She is getting a bit jealous because I have been doing a lot of research again, but that happens mostly around Christmas and drops off quite a bit during the rest of the year.

My suggestion would be to explain to her why you love this hobby as much as you do.  Explain to her that she doesn't have to share your passion, but do not hold it against you that you do enjoy it.  You aren't attempting to replace her with trains, this is just something that gives you a little bit of pleasure, kind of like the euphoric rush she gets when she is walking through a mall.  Big Smile [:D]

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Posted by ChiefEagles on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 8:50 PM
Don't have to. 

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Posted by thatboy37 on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 9:08 PM

 ChiefEagles wrote:
Don't have to. 

Sign - Ditto [#ditto]

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Posted by palallin on Tuesday, January 2, 2007 10:10 PM
It would be right silly for me to hide them from her, unless I have bought something as a surprise present for her.  A fair portion of my hobby purchases are for her. 
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Posted by Tom1947 on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 8:10 AM
I do not have to hid my purchases of trains she told me it is your money and I can spend it anyway you want.  I am thinking about an American Flyer 336 Northern that is in like new condition currently.  I said something the other night about it and I got the above reply along with it is your decision to make. 
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Posted by MartyE on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 8:21 AM

These posts make me laugh.  I don't hide or get anything past my wife.  I'm a big boy now and I can manage money, take care of my family, and buy the trains I can afford.  What is so darn hard about that?  If the house needs something I decide that I won't buy a train and get the item for the house.

Maybe you need a big hat to hide them under!  It works for Scott!Big Smile [:D]  As for me it's right through the front door.  When I neglect my obligations only then can she try to tell me different.  BTW this policy goes both ways.

Trying to update my avatar since 2020 Laugh

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Posted by dbaker48 on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 8:36 AM
 MartyE wrote:

These posts make me laugh.  I don't hide or get anything past my wife.  I'm a big boy now and I can manage money, take care of my family, and buy the trains I can afford.  What is so darn hard about that?  If the house needs something I decide that I won't buy a train and get the item for the house.

Maybe you need a big hat to hide them under!  It works for Scott!Big Smile [:D]  As for me it's right through the front door.  When I neglect my obligations only then can she try to tell me different.  BTW this policy goes both ways.

 

Sign - Ditto [#ditto]  Also it would be an insult for either one of US.  There are more important issues.

Don

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Posted by cnw1995 on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 9:05 AM

Emotions sure complicate matters, don't they? Residual guilt for whatever you've spent on your new purchase versus excitement and anticipation about opening the box and looking it over. I'm not in a season of life where I can spend 'a lot' on the hobby so I'm extra careful about how I budget for new items since I'm in charge of the bills - right now I am musing about a line maintenance car I saw in an antiques shop last week... and another Corgi trolley. With three kids, the arrival of any UPS or mailed package is a big deal - 'oh, it's another box for dad' - so there's no secrets here.

I have an acquaintence in another season of life who maintains a P.O. Box just for these circumstances.

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Posted by Deputy on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 11:45 AM

I'm beginning to wonder if the original question wasn't asked in jest. Perhaps people are taking the question a bit too seriously?

Dep

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Posted by Jumijo on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 11:51 AM

I'll usually point up to the sky and say "look at the dead bird", then run down stairs with my package before she sees it. Then, when I come back upstairs, I smack her on the fanny and tell her she should know that dead birds don't fly!

Jim 

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Posted by IRONROOSTER on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 12:26 PM
 dbaker48 wrote:
 MartyE wrote:

These posts make me laugh.  I don't hide or get anything past my wife.  I'm a big boy now and I can manage money, take care of my family, and buy the trains I can afford.  What is so darn hard about that?  If the house needs something I decide that I won't buy a train and get the item for the house.

Maybe you need a big hat to hide them under!  It works for Scott!Big Smile [:D]  As for me it's right through the front door.  When I neglect my obligations only then can she try to tell me different.  BTW this policy goes both ways.

 

Sign - Ditto [#ditto]  Also it would be an insult for either one of US.  There are more important issues.

 

Sign - Ditto [#ditto] here too. 

What's funny is this past weekend I went to a train show.  There was a locomotive I wanted on sale, but I passed on it.  When I was telling my wife about the show, she said you should have bought it, you'll be kicking yourself later. So-o-o we went back and I bought it. 

She has her hobbies and I have mine, we both cut back the spending when we need to.  Works great.

Enjoy

Paul 

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Posted by 3railguy on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 12:36 PM

I find N scale very easy to sneak in the house. 

 MartyE wrote:
These posts make me laugh.  I don't hide or get anything past my wife.  I'm a big boy now and I can manage money, take care of my family, and buy the trains I can afford.  What is so darn hard about that?  If the house needs something I decide that I won't buy a train and get the item for the house.

 If I was earning Marty's salary, I would not have to worry about blowing the family budget on trains.

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Posted by Deputy on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 1:36 PM
 jaabat wrote:

I'll usually point up to the sky and say "look at the dead bird", then run down stairs with my package before she sees it. Then, when I come back upstairs, I smack her on the fanny and tell her she should know that dead birds don't fly!

Jim 

HA! I like that one!!!! Thumbs Up [tup] Laugh [(-D]

Dep

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Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, January 3, 2007 1:53 PM

I don't have to hide any purchases from my wife.  In fact, I base my train budget on my "stash" money.  It's a tupperware container on the counter in the kitchen where we place all our daily pocket change.  Once it's full, I take it to the bank and use the money at the next train show.

Of course, if I HAVE to have something and my stash won't cover it, I'm always able to cover the additional cost (within reason)

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