Need help with parents!!!

[Anonymous]

I will offer this. As a model railroad nut this hobby kept me out of trouble in high school. My parents let me have the whole basement to build a rr. They knew where I was and what I was doing, and who I was doing it with.

When my friends started hanging around other people whose idea of fun was drinkin alcohol and driving around town, it was easy for me to say no and lose this group of friends. I had my basement empire to retreat to.

Someone said show me your friends today and I will show you your life 20 years from now. Whell, 35 years ago model railroading was the center of my life and my friendships. Today my friends are mostly model rails in a social setting and I host monthly op sessions on my basement layout. I also kept out of trouble with drugs and alcohol. Not saying this will do it, but for me it helped along with good parenting.

[RedLeader]

Here's my advice from experience:

Take your Dad to a MR show and then to a LHS. When you get home full of MR stuff your Dad paid, and your Mom sees your Dad's proud smile, showing the best Dad/Son project you can ever imagine, she will be at your side that same day.

[waltersrails]

Here is my web site http://ztrainman.tripod.com/ hope it helps and good luck to u with your parents.

[icmr]

lovintrains,
Yes, there is a manufacturer of cork roadbed, Midwest Products.
They have a website www.midwestproducts.com

[selector]

Ok, let's up the ante a bit. Ask each of them, when you can corner them in one room, this question, "What would you need from me in order to support me to construct a layout for model trains?"

It should prove interesting, and gets right to the heart of the matter.

[davekelly]

lovintrains,

Good for you! Of course, don't forget any of the promises you made. Showing that you are as good as your word is more important than the initial negotiations.

[Anonymous]

Well my mom is kinda a neat freak and is afraid of me running a me in her basement. I have vouluntered to clean twice a week my area and the rest of the basement. I got a "i'll think about it" Yeah!!!! Halfway there. My dad is harder to convince. By the way TrainFreak409 were did u get ur csx loco in the pic.

[TrainFreak409]

Let's see,

You will be engaging an a healthy hobby that will increase your responsibility, creativity, imagination, and respect for money. Participating in the hobby, and joining clubs and organizations about such, will further develop your social skills, and help you make new friends.

Or, you could ask them, "Would you rather me play with trains in the basement, or go out and tra***he school with a bunch of irresponsible punk kids?"

[davekelly]

Here's an additional thought. Start working on a little project and then ask dad for some help. As a dad, I can tell you that that is the best thing a son can say. Of course doing this does have some hazards - he may get too involved!!

There's nothing better than kids and parents doing something creative together - memories to last a lifetime (thanks Dad!).

[joeh19012]

[#ditto] Hey, lovintrains!

I am going along with everyone else's posts here. This is not The World's Greatest Hobby for nothing. I learned how to use power tools, how things are put together, and how to fix all kinds of stuff around the house because I was "playing with trains."

All the good suggestions are right on the money: this hobby requires the use of so many different skills in so many different areas that you have to learn something. Plus, you can spend more time on those aspects you like versus those you don't like as much.

If you're into
Electronics: DCC, signalling and detection systems are something that you can install and build yourself, all the while learning about digital circuits and solid state components like transistors and diodes. If you can wire a remote controlled turnout, you can wire a telephone extension or an additional cable TV jack.
Carpentry: benchwork, geometry, trigonometry.
History: modeling a prototype, period architecture, period vehicles, clothing, advertising, etc.
Art: scenery, dioramas, detailing scenes, etc.
Architecture: building kits, kitbashing, scratchbuilding, etc.

These are all skills that can get you JOBS, help you get into college, and stay with you for life by helping you live in a house. For now, you develop skills that you can use to help your parents.

Good luck! [:)][^][8D]

[Anonymous]

Everyones post are great! Go along with that! pu***hat idea hard...(to a point) Also try and get them into what you are doing!..Maybe ask for help towards a project that you are working on! Anything to show them that you want them to help out with! I started the same way!(when I was at home) I started with a 4x8 layout and within a month My father wanted to start working along the basement walls..Trust me..At first he wanted nothing todo with it! He had a bluegrass band that played down there! They stopped bluegrass and started to help out! Pitch it to them the way they will understand it!

[ARTHILL]

You have had a lot of help here. How are you doing? I remember so well my time in this position (1949) and how good it was when my dad brought home a tank car for me to build and implied that it was ok to buy some track. Things were different then, but just the same.

[Anonymous]

You can buy cork roadbed at your local hobby store (LHS). It comes in different sizes for the different scales. For a yard, I use sheet cork from Michael's or Hobby Lobby.

[davekelly]

mac4884
Actually, "the last thing" is the best reason.

[Anonymous]

Tell them all of the worse things you could be doing. This is coming from a 15 year old too. Play it smart, I bribed my mom into letting me buy a bigboy(with my own birthday money!) by explaining the things I could be doing other than model railroading, how I needed more motive power, how many trains the average model railroader has & how my school grades have always been aced. The last thing could be left out .

[robengland]

Lovintrains: PLAN the sitdown talk with the folks. I don't mean script it. I mean
1) What do you want out at the end of it: best case (all the basement and heaps of funding), worst case (not actually prohibited from touching trains but must ';wait and see"), and most probable (OK but something small to start with)
2) what are your main arguments (remember focused on what is in it for them and what are their concerns)
3) what do you think their main arguments will be and how do you counter those

Go in prepared, keep your cool, and be prepared to be reasonable.


Re cork roadbed: it is wonderful stuff and the discount hobby shops (see Model Railroader or the internet) sell it pretty cheap, but even cheaper (and better for big areas like a yard) is packets of cork tiles from the discount hardware store. It's harder to follow a trackplan drawn on the baseboard with tile than with roadbed.

[CraigN]

If all the previous suggestions don't work, try this. The next time you are riding in a car with your parents and you pass a homeless guy or some street punks. Just point to one of them and say " hey Mom, see that guy over there, he used to be into model railroading, but he quit because his parents wouldn't let him have basement space for a layout ".

I'll bet you get a laugh and maybe they might even start thinking of the alternative things you could be doing with your spare time.

[ARTHILL]

Cork is available, but I chose Woodland Scenics Foam roadbed this time and am glad. Good luck. I am certainly glad my parents and I were able to solve this back in 1949. I am now helping G-children get started with the encouragement of their parents (My kids).

[davekelly]

Texas Zepher,

Yeah I know. If I had a nickel for every time I thought about buying something that has raised in price big time over the next several years . . . I'd be fighting Bill Gates for the title of the richest dude in the world!

[Texas Zepher]

QUOTE: Originally posted by davekelly
I used to think the tube testing machine was pretty cool. Saw one at an antique store a couple of years ago - the bottom storage area of the machine was filled with tubes in their original boxes - almost bought the thing!

You should have, tubes are making a come back in high-end electronics. Tubes on ebay are going for a fortune.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for all the help we are having a sit down disscusion on my mrr. is there any manufactureres of cork roadbed or do i have to make it myself

[railroadyoshi]

the best thing you can do is show your parents you can stick to it
dont get discouraged, and try to learn to do it yourself, though it would be great if you can somehow get your parents even interested in doing it with you

good luck

[davekelly]

Mr. Beasely

Gosh I remember going with my dad to R&S with a bag of tubes. I used to think the tube testing machine was pretty cool. Saw one at an antique store a couple of years ago - the bottom storage area of the machine was filled with tubes in their original boxes - almost bought the thing!

I think your comments are right on the money. I learned alot from the hobby when I was growing up and it helped me, like you, with my engineering studies at U of P as well as my law degree at Texas Tech. I think ours is a very tricky hobby - especially for young people. Disguised as having a great time - we learn a bunch too!

[MisterBeasley]

If you asked your parents for a "study area" to help improve your academic skills and test scores, would they say, "Yes?" My guess is, they would. When I was a teenager, my principle activity was model railroading for a lot of years. It taught me about the "other" kinds of "engineering," not the drivin' that train part, but the kind you study at MIT. I learned to build structures that would take weight, and I learned to design and build my own circuits. I learned the fine art of troubleshooting from cantankerous old engines, too.

My parents were pretty happy with the situation. If I wasn't home, I was probably at my friend's house working on HIS layout. I didn't spend my evenings in front of the TV set, although I occasionally had to fix it, or re-wire the antenna for them. (Just for reference, there were no video games, and the TV sets had tubes you had to occaisionally replace at the 60's equivalent of Radio Shack.)

And when the time came to leave, those skills came in real handy at MIT.

[Medina1128]

Old?? HighIron, how about Jimi Hendrix and Led Zeppelin? When I was about to propose the idea of building a layout in our basement to my wife, I had some of my seedier buddies come over. Naturally, the conversation with this bunch went to bars, stripper clubs, and just plain hanging out. After that, she was more receptive to something that would keep me home, and probably just as important, from under her feet... It's worked. I have an area 12x33 ft. of our basement devoted to a workbench, work area and a layout...[8D]

[canadian351]

Well I lucked out with my parents. However I also was lucky enough to have a beat up old room in the basement along with enough money to pay for everything out my own pocket.

So do what I did and get a job. If you're responsible enough to hold one that's going to help a lot with getting your foot in the door with the parents.

Also make sure you're far enough to actually build it yourself. be realistic. I begged for my own space long before I was even close to being able to start given the knowledge and developement I had at the time.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely. That's a great idea. Decide what kind of yard you want on your large layout, and build that first. Then not only will your parents see that you are dedicated, but they will likely become interested themselves.

QUOTE: Originally posted by davekelly


There is one thing that I think parents worry about on any new venture. What is your dedication level or sticktoitness? Do they fear they will shell out a bunch of bucks just to have you lose interest in a few months? How about start with a small diorama or small switching layout? You can then slowly add to it bit by bit. I think, in addition to many of the posts above that tell of the benefiets, you also must show them that this is not a fly by night fad, but the start of a lifelong hobby.

[davekelly]

There is one thing that I think parents worry about on any new venture. What is your dedication level or sticktoitness? Do they fear they will shell out a bunch of bucks just to have you lose interest in a few months? How about start with a small diorama or small switching layout? You can then slowly add to it bit by bit. I think, in addition to many of the posts above that tell of the benefiets, you also must show them that this is not a fly by night fad, but the start of a lifelong hobby.

[Anonymous]

Here are some things I'd counter them with.

1). "I could be becomming an alhoholic and drug addict spending all my left over money trying to contract AIDS from hookers.

2). "Dammit mom, don't bump my leg. You know I've been in traction for 8 weeks after that DUI accident".

3). "I plea the fifth, your Honor. I don't care if my prints are on the gun. I didn't hold up that liquor store".

4). Mom, dad....we need to talk. Me and Becky Lou had sex without a condom...and yall are gonna be grandparents".

I think you see my direction here. Model railroading is something that ANY parent should be PROUD that children are involved with. In this day and time, that's rare.

QUOTE: Originally posted by lovintrains

My parents arent to keen on giving me a area in the basement for my ho layout. What are some good ideas to help convince themm to let me build. i have a weel planed out plan. This will be my first real layout.[:D]