Need help with parents!!!

[Anonymous]

My parents arent to keen on giving me a area in the basement for my ho layout. What are some good ideas to help convince themm to let me build. i have a weel planed out plan. This will be my first real layout.[:D]

[ukguy]

To name but a few good reasons off hand, tell them :-

they'll know where you are and what you are doing (nothing illegal or health damaging to worry about)
You will learn many skills for future life, ie, woodworking, electronics, painting skills, project assembly, (Dad will appreciate that next time Mom buys the next "flat pack" item of furniture), to name but a few.
It will teach you dedication, perseverance, patience, planning skills, concentration, amongst others, all of which can be transfered to educational benefits.
They will know what to buy you for bithdays, christmas, etc.
Did I mention they will know where you are and what you are doing, a big concern for teenagers parents. (though you didnt mention your age)
Offer to clean/tidy the rest of the basement as you do the area for yourself.
The magazines they find under your bed will be MR.

That should get you started, I'm sure others will chip in with everything else I havent mentioned.

Have fun, be safe & good luck.
Karl.

[Anonymous]

You might try breaking down the plan into small sections and build them as modules that you can connect together as you demonstrate some skills and reponsibility in the execution of the layout. A four or eight foot long by one or two foot wide section that could be a switching area so that you would be able to "run" some trains, do some scenery, and populate with some buildings and industries. Ask for a small section not the whole thing!
Will

[selector]

[#ditto] what UKGuy said.

If I may add some thoughts, you may be able to call upon another subject in which you persevered, somethng that you accomplished for which they have given you credit and praise. If you have no other history of that nature, then your task will be very much an uphill battle.

Still, as Karl points out, you might ask to meet with them in a semi-formal way, say around the dining room table/kitchen table, and show them a reasoned plan, including steps, some pretty well nailed down costs, and maybe some reinforcing e-mails from this forum to back up what you are saying. Their fears (if any), may lie in your naivete, or what they assume is a lack of experience and knowledge. Nip this in the bud.

Try to anticipate what their reluctance or objections will hinge upon, and methodically reduce them to doing the 'guppy"...you know, when their eyes go wide and their mouths open and close several times? [:D] Do this by having a firm plan, including schematics, and a list of costs (DO NOT BLOW SMOKE UP THEIR BUTTS ON THE COSTS!!!!!). Present it to them with excitement, but with an ability to answer all their questions and allaying all of their concerns.

If you do all of this, and they refuse, then you know you have not undercut yourself with half-measures or poor communications. They just won't support you at this time.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

If you take your parents to the hobbyshop and show them what switches and track you plan to use in your plan as well as the different features of your layout, they will be much supportive.

DO try to keep them away from the Brass Display (If there is anything really expensive, we dont want to scare them... that will come later when you grow up)

[Anonymous]

All the above are good ideas and if they don't work I would suggest getting a structure kit and building it. You get a little experiance modeling and you demonstrate to the parents that you are serious and will follow through.

I would also reccomend building your layout in modules. If you are as green at this as I am (I started in January) your skills will improve rapidly as you go. By the time you have compleated your third module you will want to go back and redo the first to your new standards.

Good Luck.

[claycts]

QUOTE: Originally posted by lovintrains

My parents arent to keen on giving me a area in the basement for my ho layout. What are some good ideas to help convince themm to let me build. i have a weel planed out plan. This will be my first real layout.[:D]

50 years ago I had the same problem, I used the TRADE SYSTEM, I want this, what do you want that I can trade for? I t cost me some house painting, grass cutting and such but I did get the space and some extras because I did good job for them.
Good luck!
P.S. DO NOT SHOW THEM ANY BRASS PRICES!!! They will have a cow!!

[Texas Zepher]

[#ditto] what claycts said.

You didn't say what level in school you were in but perhaps you could trade with your school grades. Say, "Model Railroading will help me improve my school grades because I'll be using math, writing, research skills". Let them know it won't interfear with your school work.

In 7th grade metals shop I designed and fabricated sheet metal HO scale bridges.
In 9th grade my final project for drafting class was a full basement design to model Santa Fe's Raton Pass.
In 10th grade I used my free lance railroad as the subject of a short story written as the final project for English class, "A Fan Trip on the Pine Ridge". I used MR problems to help me understand the geometry proofs.
In 11th grade American Government my final project was a display of the evolution of the American railroad and how it changed the politics of the country. In Publications class I made field trips to the local RR station to write articles for the school paper on the Rock Island railroad going broke and what it meant to the community.
This continued through out school. My last paper, just last year, for a Master's level finance class was "An Economic Comparison of the CSX and Norfolk Southern Railroads after the Conrail Aquisitions".

Also you don't have to have a layout to make really cool models to prove to your parents that is it just more than a passing fad. We didn't have a basement and I had an 8'x9' room so was very limited on space. I built a 2'x8' layout that went over my bed.

Model responsibly, keep your school work on track, and earn their respect for your modeling interests.

[robengland]

As I explained to my son, you need to present your case in terms of what's in it for your parents, not for you, so as listed above:
- know where you are
- tidy basement
- easy present-buying

and one I'd add to think about:
- something for you and your Dad or Granddad or siblings to share???

[ARTHILL]

Good suggestions. Do you know why they are opposed. My kids learned that I listened the best when they to talked about my concerns, not their wants. If they are into sarcasm you might suggest that you have lost interest in MRR and want to follow a gangsta rap group around.
Good luck, it can be done, I convinced my parents, my kids convinced me, My Gkids convince their parents and I got room in my basement from my wife. It can be done.

[Anonymous]

gangsta rap group? Following them around? yuck. Now I know I am old.

I guess I can say.. following "The Boss" and his E street band around. How's that? The money I spent in the tapes, holders, radio with players and other accessories probably can fund a fully functional layout back then.

Keep the folks AWAY from the really expensive stuff. I cannot stress that enough. If they did catch sight of the BLI engine chugging and pumping air on the Hobby Shop's track while having a 400.00 price tag attached to it... calmly explain to the fainting parents that Ebay probably has the same engine for more than half off without the tax (Shipping? eh.)

[Anonymous]

Here are some things I'd counter them with.

1). "I could be becomming an alhoholic and drug addict spending all my left over money trying to contract AIDS from hookers.

2). "Dammit mom, don't bump my leg. You know I've been in traction for 8 weeks after that DUI accident".

3). "I plea the fifth, your Honor. I don't care if my prints are on the gun. I didn't hold up that liquor store".

4). Mom, dad....we need to talk. Me and Becky Lou had sex without a condom...and yall are gonna be grandparents".

I think you see my direction here. Model railroading is something that ANY parent should be PROUD that children are involved with. In this day and time, that's rare.

QUOTE: Originally posted by lovintrains

My parents arent to keen on giving me a area in the basement for my ho layout. What are some good ideas to help convince themm to let me build. i have a weel planed out plan. This will be my first real layout.[:D]

[davekelly]

There is one thing that I think parents worry about on any new venture. What is your dedication level or sticktoitness? Do they fear they will shell out a bunch of bucks just to have you lose interest in a few months? How about start with a small diorama or small switching layout? You can then slowly add to it bit by bit. I think, in addition to many of the posts above that tell of the benefiets, you also must show them that this is not a fly by night fad, but the start of a lifelong hobby.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely. That's a great idea. Decide what kind of yard you want on your large layout, and build that first. Then not only will your parents see that you are dedicated, but they will likely become interested themselves.

QUOTE: Originally posted by davekelly


There is one thing that I think parents worry about on any new venture. What is your dedication level or sticktoitness? Do they fear they will shell out a bunch of bucks just to have you lose interest in a few months? How about start with a small diorama or small switching layout? You can then slowly add to it bit by bit. I think, in addition to many of the posts above that tell of the benefiets, you also must show them that this is not a fly by night fad, but the start of a lifelong hobby.

[canadian351]

Well I lucked out with my parents. However I also was lucky enough to have a beat up old room in the basement along with enough money to pay for everything out my own pocket.

So do what I did and get a job. If you're responsible enough to hold one that's going to help a lot with getting your foot in the door with the parents.

Also make sure you're far enough to actually build it yourself. be realistic. I begged for my own space long before I was even close to being able to start given the knowledge and developement I had at the time.

[Medina1128]

Old?? HighIron, how about Jimi Hendrix and Led Zeppelin? When I was about to propose the idea of building a layout in our basement to my wife, I had some of my seedier buddies come over. Naturally, the conversation with this bunch went to bars, stripper clubs, and just plain hanging out. After that, she was more receptive to something that would keep me home, and probably just as important, from under her feet... It's worked. I have an area 12x33 ft. of our basement devoted to a workbench, work area and a layout...[8D]

[MisterBeasley]

If you asked your parents for a "study area" to help improve your academic skills and test scores, would they say, "Yes?" My guess is, they would. When I was a teenager, my principle activity was model railroading for a lot of years. It taught me about the "other" kinds of "engineering," not the drivin' that train part, but the kind you study at MIT. I learned to build structures that would take weight, and I learned to design and build my own circuits. I learned the fine art of troubleshooting from cantankerous old engines, too.

My parents were pretty happy with the situation. If I wasn't home, I was probably at my friend's house working on HIS layout. I didn't spend my evenings in front of the TV set, although I occasionally had to fix it, or re-wire the antenna for them. (Just for reference, there were no video games, and the TV sets had tubes you had to occaisionally replace at the 60's equivalent of Radio Shack.)

And when the time came to leave, those skills came in real handy at MIT.

[davekelly]

Mr. Beasely

Gosh I remember going with my dad to R&S with a bag of tubes. I used to think the tube testing machine was pretty cool. Saw one at an antique store a couple of years ago - the bottom storage area of the machine was filled with tubes in their original boxes - almost bought the thing!

I think your comments are right on the money. I learned alot from the hobby when I was growing up and it helped me, like you, with my engineering studies at U of P as well as my law degree at Texas Tech. I think ours is a very tricky hobby - especially for young people. Disguised as having a great time - we learn a bunch too!

[railroadyoshi]

the best thing you can do is show your parents you can stick to it
dont get discouraged, and try to learn to do it yourself, though it would be great if you can somehow get your parents even interested in doing it with you

good luck

[Anonymous]

Thanks for all the help we are having a sit down disscusion on my mrr. is there any manufactureres of cork roadbed or do i have to make it myself

[Texas Zepher]

QUOTE: Originally posted by davekelly
I used to think the tube testing machine was pretty cool. Saw one at an antique store a couple of years ago - the bottom storage area of the machine was filled with tubes in their original boxes - almost bought the thing!

You should have, tubes are making a come back in high-end electronics. Tubes on ebay are going for a fortune.

[davekelly]

Texas Zepher,

Yeah I know. If I had a nickel for every time I thought about buying something that has raised in price big time over the next several years . . . I'd be fighting Bill Gates for the title of the richest dude in the world!

[ARTHILL]

Cork is available, but I chose Woodland Scenics Foam roadbed this time and am glad. Good luck. I am certainly glad my parents and I were able to solve this back in 1949. I am now helping G-children get started with the encouragement of their parents (My kids).

[CraigN]

If all the previous suggestions don't work, try this. The next time you are riding in a car with your parents and you pass a homeless guy or some street punks. Just point to one of them and say " hey Mom, see that guy over there, he used to be into model railroading, but he quit because his parents wouldn't let him have basement space for a layout ".

I'll bet you get a laugh and maybe they might even start thinking of the alternative things you could be doing with your spare time.

[robengland]

Lovintrains: PLAN the sitdown talk with the folks. I don't mean script it. I mean
1) What do you want out at the end of it: best case (all the basement and heaps of funding), worst case (not actually prohibited from touching trains but must ';wait and see"), and most probable (OK but something small to start with)
2) what are your main arguments (remember focused on what is in it for them and what are their concerns)
3) what do you think their main arguments will be and how do you counter those

Go in prepared, keep your cool, and be prepared to be reasonable.


Re cork roadbed: it is wonderful stuff and the discount hobby shops (see Model Railroader or the internet) sell it pretty cheap, but even cheaper (and better for big areas like a yard) is packets of cork tiles from the discount hardware store. It's harder to follow a trackplan drawn on the baseboard with tile than with roadbed.

[Anonymous]

Tell them all of the worse things you could be doing. This is coming from a 15 year old too. Play it smart, I bribed my mom into letting me buy a bigboy(with my own birthday money!) by explaining the things I could be doing other than model railroading, how I needed more motive power, how many trains the average model railroader has & how my school grades have always been aced. The last thing could be left out .

[davekelly]

mac4884
Actually, "the last thing" is the best reason.

[Anonymous]

You can buy cork roadbed at your local hobby store (LHS). It comes in different sizes for the different scales. For a yard, I use sheet cork from Michael's or Hobby Lobby.

[ARTHILL]

You have had a lot of help here. How are you doing? I remember so well my time in this position (1949) and how good it was when my dad brought home a tank car for me to build and implied that it was ok to buy some track. Things were different then, but just the same.

[Anonymous]

Everyones post are great! Go along with that! pu***hat idea hard...(to a point) Also try and get them into what you are doing!..Maybe ask for help towards a project that you are working on! Anything to show them that you want them to help out with! I started the same way!(when I was at home) I started with a 4x8 layout and within a month My father wanted to start working along the basement walls..Trust me..At first he wanted nothing todo with it! He had a bluegrass band that played down there! They stopped bluegrass and started to help out! Pitch it to them the way they will understand it!