Murphy's Laws of Model Railroading

[Anonymous]

The Law of Direct Fiscal/Temporal Probablility:

The larger the dollar value of your model railroad purchases during the month, the greater the likelihood that your significant other will obtain and scrutinize the credit card statement before you do.

This law applies especially to items such as $200+ brass cabeese.

Tom

[Anonymous]

It's nice to see some of y'all have a sense of humor.

BTW, which chapter do you belong to?

Ed

[mhdishere]

Maybe I'm luckier than most, but my wife encourages my model railroading. She knows she could walk into any bar and find men in there whose wives WI***hey were in the basement playing with toy trains.

[Anonymous]

Everyone, all together

"HI ED!"

[Anonymous]

Michael,

I know nobody cares but that isn't a violation of the laws of physics. A part falling trades potential energy for kinetic energy. But a part moving horizontally is not theoretically 'doing work', so in the absence of friction, a part could fall two-and-a-half feet hit something and move an infinite distance horizontally.

Yea, I know . . . My name is Ed and I'm a recovering geek.

Ed

[Anonymous]

Dave,

I couldn't agree more about model railroad economics. When I am activly working on my layout, I limit myself to $20 a week. Doesn't sound like much, but at that pace I would spend $1,000 a year! Our layouts represent a substantial investment in money and time. But I can't think of a better bang for the buck. - Ed

[Anonymous]

The law of inverse proportions:

The no matter how little of a complaint you make about how much your spouse spends on anything, your spouse will make an exponentially larger fuss of how much you money and time you spend on you railroad.

[dknelson]

This is model railroading son ... the laws of physics do not apply here. Nor the laws of economics.
Dave

[Anonymous]

boo you to ger

[Anonymous]

and speaking of parts following on the floor: how can a little plastic part weighing a fraction of an ounce, fall 2&1/2 feet to a thick carpet and wind up 12 ft from the drop point. Isn't that a violation of the laws of physics?

[GerFust]

I have to side with Mike on this one. It wasn't funny. Nor did it do anything to add to modelrailroading. That could have been stated less lewdly and more broadly without the illicit slang as "When really enjoying your layout your wife, kids, etc. will come by and want to spend time with you somehow else."

[Dad Howe]

I've had two laws confirmed over several years of Model Railroading:

1. The smallest part always lands in the deepest carpet. And then hides.

2. The more important a part is to the repair of the item, the more often it WILL land on the floor.

2a. Regardless of a part's importance to the repair, it WILL land on the floor at least twice before the repair is made.

Dad Howe

[dknelson]

Something tells me Ross's posting was done under intense duress by a wife -- most model rails know better than to leave a message where a wife might hear it.

[Anonymous]

BOO YOU MIKE

[Anonymous]

That is an extremely inappropriate posting, and does not at all fit in with what has been a very enjoyable thread !!!!

[Anonymous]

Always tell your wife about a purchase because
some one might call to ask a question and you are
not home. The person on the phone will say, I want
to know where to get one and how much it was? Now
don't get red when your wife asks you.

[Anonymous]

THE LAW OF ALL.Your wife or girlfriend comes in the train room when you are having fun and offers you a PIECE.

[Anonymous]

Law 25: You will find the part/tool you were looking for last week only when you are looking for a different one though in your excitement of finding it you will have forgotten what you were looking for in the first place.

Law 26: A train will pull apart during an open day at a spot where it passed without incident before only due to the fact that the aisles are clogged with people and you being the only one running the trains have to get to it before the following train gives the stopped one a 'shove' and no other members have noticed because the are talking to the public.

[BR60103]

Law 24: The more cars a manufacturer sells, the less likely they are to tell you exactly what they based the model on (if they did).

[cbq9911a]

Law 21: When an eagerly anticipated model comes in, it will be, in some subtle but very obvious way, incorrect.

Law 21a: Equipment lettered for Chicago and North Western is particularly prone to follow law 21.

Law 22: HO Couplers are never at the right height.

Law 23: Manufacturers seldom letter and paint models to represent preserved pieces of equipment, even though it would lead to increased sales.

[Anonymous]

Law #18 is great...a classic. LOL

[Anonymous]

Amen to that.

Whitney

[Anonymous]

Law 19 While on a roll making progress on a pet project, you will run out of a critically needed paint, glue etc. 5 minutes after the store closes.
Law 20, You need ONE specific size turnout, switch machine etc. to complete an important section of your layout. Guess which one the store will tell you "Will be in next Thursday"? Ron H.

[Anonymous]

Law 17: There is a join in the Homasote exactly where the pins for your ground throw need to be inserted. ( 17a: It is the only ground throw that is at full arms' length from the front of the benchwork.)
Law 18: You have built a hinged tracked section for layout access, out of materials which have a virtual zero coefficient of expansion and contraction. Your benchwork on both sides is of dry, seasoned lumber, heavily braced. The entire railroad room itself, will then expand and contract seasonally to ensure a poor fit.

[Anonymous]

Law 15: The amount of paint spilled, is equaled to the amount of paint needed to finish a project.
Law 16: Cheap pair of tweezers are good for pulling slivers, and shooting small detail parts across the room.

[dknelson]

Not a "law" but I am reminded of an old Model Railroader cartoon. The guy's benchwork looks awful -- crooked and irregular. He's looking at his level and saying "Well I'll be! The little bubble's stuck!"

Dave

[Anonymous]

14th law The small brass detail part that fell in into the carpet, and you thought was gone forever usually ends up on the bottom of your wife's barefoot.

[MAbruce]

13th (N-scale) loco law. If a Kato F7A and a Bachmann F7A were to fall from the layout at the same time, the Kato unit will suffer catastrophic damage while the Bachmann would be suffer no apparent damage - and even run better as a result.

[Anonymous]

These are great fun. Here are a couple from my experience.

11th Law:
That cut-off disk that shattered while in use and flew who-knows-where is impossible to find until a visitor, observing your best scenic vignette says, "Hey, what's that?"

12th Law:
That tool that has been missing forever turns up in some weird location under the layout where you laid it temporarily. But, it does so only after you have purchased a replacement.

Have fun,
George