Paul of Covington When I was a kid in Honduras, before 1952 when we moved here, the milk was delivered by mule cart.
And then there's the legendary fire horses whose second career was with a milk wagon, which was OK until they heard an alarm...
As an aside, many of the horses did actually learn the alarms to which they were normally going to respond.
And speaking of firehouses, one of the mascots in a Chicago firehouse had the uncanny ability to foretell an alarm. Or so they thought. At the time, there was a speaker in each firehouse over which the dispatch announced the alarm. Normally the circuit for each station's speaker was off, to be turned on when it came time to send out a company.
Turns out the dog wasn't prescient at all - it heard the "pop" as the speaker was connected and would be running for the trucks before the dispatcher started to announce the alarm.
I had a dog that recognized our pager tones (the scanner is always on). She didn't do anything more than get out of the way. A friend had two pups who knew that when that department's tones came over the radio it was time to head for their kennels.
Larry Resident Microferroequinologist (at least at my house) Everyone goes home; Safety begins with you My Opinion. Standard Disclaimers Apply. No Expiration Date Come ride the rails with me! There's one thing about humility - the moment you think you've got it, you've lost it...
I had to go back to the last page to figure out how we got to subject of milk.
________
Another variation on "fly in the soup":
" Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?"
"Looks like the backstroke, sir."
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"A stranger's just a friend you ain't met yet." --- Dave Gardner
MiningmanIn Hamilton, Ont. , a big industrial city, milk was delivered by horse drawn milk vans.
That reminds me:
When I was a kid in Honduras, before 1952 when we moved here, the milk was delivered by mule cart. The mules had different personalities. One didn't want move--they had to yell and pull and poke him to get him to start. Another one never wanted to stop--they would chase him down the street.
Then there was the one that appreciated music. There was a club with a live band about two blocks around the corner from our house. One day he was standing in front of our house when the band started playing. He immediately took off at a trot toward the club with the crew chasing after him.
As to milk in glass bottles, for a time we took delivery on such from a small dairy, It was neither pasteurized nor homogenized, and could sit in the sun a while. Then we changed to a much larger dairy which processed the milk "properly"--and we had to bring the milk in early.
In college, we still received milk in bottles, and it was served at breakfast and the evening meal. If I emptied a bottle in the evening, I would hold it over my glass and squeeze it as though I were getting the last drop out--and one evening, the boy sitting next to me reached over and made the motions of stripping a cow (I thanked him for that).
Johnny
zardoz Deggesty A young man was out driving with his girl friend. She said, sternly, "Use both hands!" He replied, "I can't; I need one to steer." I gotta stop drinking coffee when I read some of these...
Deggesty A young man was out driving with his girl friend. She said, sternly, "Use both hands!" He replied, "I can't; I need one to steer."
A young man was out driving with his girl friend. She said, sternly, "Use both hands!" He replied, "I can't; I need one to steer."
I gotta stop drinking coffee when I read some of these...
Another one: He--"I don't see what keeps you girls warm in the winter". She--"You are not supposed to."
A man who had asked for soup in a restaurant took one look at the soup after the waiter brought it to him and immediatley yelled at the waiter, "THERE'S A FLY IN MY SOUP!"
The waiter's response was, "Please don't yell; everybody else will want a fly."
Then there was the fellow who tried eating vichyssoise in the rain at a sidewalk cafe...
The waiter's response was, "Please don't yell; everybody else will want one."
First of all... This is the humor thread and THAT (the Borden bankruptcy) AIN'T FUNNY!
2nd, I blame the medical community. I was told to NOT drink milk, "it is good for very young children, but not adults", or so said my PCP.
Then I was told I need to take a calcium supliment to improve my bone structure.
HOG WASH! (and I told her so!).
I remember getting milk from both Borden and Polk on every other day... even had two insulated boxes on the porch to put the 3 half-gallon glass bottles in. Us kids had milk with just about every meal. Good stuff! (And good for you!)
Semper Vaporo
Pkgs.
BaltACD Miningman In Hamilton, Ont. , a big industrial city, milk was delivered by horse drawn milk vans. They were not replaced until 1961! I remember well when a horse had one leg stuck down an open man hole on our street. Hard to believe nowadays relating that story. Stoney Creek Dairy. They were famous for sundaes, banana splits and all that at their dairy delivered to your car. Everyone in Hamilton had a big plastic round tray proudly stamped ' Stolen from the Stoney Creek Dairy'. Elsie the Cow files for bankruptcy. https://www.cnn.com/2020/01/06/business/borden-dairy-bankruptcy/index.html
Miningman In Hamilton, Ont. , a big industrial city, milk was delivered by horse drawn milk vans. They were not replaced until 1961! I remember well when a horse had one leg stuck down an open man hole on our street. Hard to believe nowadays relating that story. Stoney Creek Dairy. They were famous for sundaes, banana splits and all that at their dairy delivered to your car. Everyone in Hamilton had a big plastic round tray proudly stamped ' Stolen from the Stoney Creek Dairy'.
They were famous for sundaes, banana splits and all that at their dairy delivered to your car. Everyone in Hamilton had a big plastic round tray proudly stamped ' Stolen from the Stoney Creek Dairy'.
Elsie the Cow files for bankruptcy.
https://www.cnn.com/2020/01/06/business/borden-dairy-bankruptcy/index.html
Lady Firestorm says it's the fault of all those lame-a$$es drinking artificial milk instead of the real stuff!
She was a milkman's daughter, don't ya know?
MiningmanIn Hamilton, Ont. , a big industrial city, milk was delivered by horse drawn milk vans. They were not replaced until 1961! I remember well when a horse had one leg stuck down an open man hole on our street. Hard to believe nowadays relating that story. Stoney Creek Dairy. They were famous for sundaes, banana splits and all that at their dairy delivered to your car. Everyone in Hamilton had a big plastic round tray proudly stamped ' Stolen from the Stoney Creek Dairy'.
Never too old to have a happy childhood!
In Toronto there is a company called Back Motor Bodies that makes truck bodies, mainly cube vans. In the lobby of the company when I was there, was a photo of a milk truck they made in 1938. It had a rivetted metal body, steel wheels, pneumatic tires, headlights and a windshield wiper. It had a one horse horse in between two shafts with the throttle reins going back into the cab.
In Hamilton, Ont. , a big industrial city, milk was delivered by horse drawn milk vans. They were not replaced until 1961! I remember well when a horse had one leg stuck down an open man hole on our street. Hard to believe nowadays relating that story. Stoney Creek Dairy.
zardozI remember the milkman coming to our house.
We had a milk man for a while when we moved into the village. In fact, our new house had a small compartment next to the door where the milk could go. Unfortunately, it wouldn't hold gallon bottles, which is how we usually got milk. In fact, I'm not sure it would hold half gallons. So we had an insulated box on the back (side) porch.
I had a morning paper route and regularly saw the milkman pulling out of his starting place, dripping down the road (melted ice).
My memory is of the round bottles that would be put on our porch and in the winter, having the cream freeze and push up the cap. I got to put some sugar on it and walla, ICE CREAM.
What I remember was my Pop getting up before dawn and walking to the milk shed and getting the day's milk from the cow (Reddie) and bringing it back and pouring it into the bottles through a cheese cloth. When I was about five or six, he sold the cow and we started getting our milk in town at the store. I think my Mom missed having her fresh cream for the coffee every morning, though.
54light15A guy walks into a resturant and asks the waiter, "Do you serve crabs?" the waiter says, "This is a shoe store, we don't serve food."
???
I think I get the basic gag (but maybe not), but are you sure that's how that goes?
tree68 Flintlock76 So two drunks are staggering up Lexington Avenue in New York City. One rolls down a subway entrance while the other keeps walking. A few blocks later, the first walks past a another subway entrance while his buddy staggers up. "Hey!" says the first, "Where YOU been?" "Down in some guys basement. Good Lord, you should see the Lionel set HE'S got!"
Flintlock76 So two drunks are staggering up Lexington Avenue in New York City. One rolls down a subway entrance while the other keeps walking. A few blocks later, the first walks past a another subway entrance while his buddy staggers up. "Hey!" says the first, "Where YOU been?" "Down in some guys basement. Good Lord, you should see the Lionel set HE'S got!"
So two drunks are staggering up Lexington Avenue in New York City. One rolls down a subway entrance while the other keeps walking. A few blocks later, the first walks past a another subway entrance while his buddy staggers up.
"Hey!" says the first, "Where YOU been?"
"Down in some guys basement. Good Lord, you should see the Lionel set HE'S got!"
54light15The milkman didn't come to our house.
Zardoz- I worked in a boiler room for many years. There was a guy there who made a joke about his grandma and a wringer washer. He said, "you don't know what a wringer washer is, do you, young fella?" I said, "Jack, I know what a wringer washer is. We did not have one. The furnace did not burn coal and our car didn't have running boards. The milkman didn't come to our house. Times sure change, huh Jack?" He didn't talk to me for at least a week after that.
A priest, a minster and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, a joke?'
A guy walks into a bar with a pig on his head. The Bartender says, "Where'd you get him" The pig says, "At the fair."
A guy walks into a resturant and asks the waiter, "Do you serve crabs?" the waiter says, "This is a shoe store, we don't serve food."
A guy orders a bowl of soup and says to the waiter "What's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter says, "You ordered fly broth, that meat will cost you extra."
I'll stop now.
DeggestyThe young man was talking with his lady friend: "Do you like Kipling?" She replied, "I don't know; how do you kipple?"
She replied, "I don't know; how do you kipple?"
Reminds me of the joke about the midwestern ladies' literary club who had brought in a professor to lecture on the poetry of Keats. The lady making the introduction said "and now we will hear the answer to a question I'm sure many of us have had: exactly what are 'Keats'?
The young man was talking with his lady friend: "Do you like Kipling?"
I saw a wino eating a bunch of grapes.
Turns out he had no patience.
A wee bit of levity to start the year.
Patient: Give it to me straight, Doc.
Doctor: Well, I'm afraid you've got Tom Jones Disease.
Patient: Tom Jones Disease? I've never heard of it. Is it common?
Doctor: Well, it's not unusual.
The totally exasperated high school football player gets right in a player's face and screams, "What the #u©k is it with you, kid? Is it ignorance, or is it apathy?"
"I don't know, and I don't care."
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