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A man joined a big multinational company as a trainee. On his first day, he dialled the pantry and shouted into the phone: "Get me a f#*king cup of coffee, quickly!" The voice from the other side responded: "You fool, you've dialled the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to?" "No," replied the trainee. "It's the Managing Director of the company, idiot!" The trainee shouted back: "And do you know who you are talking to, you idiot?" "No!" replied the Managing Director indignantly. "Good!" replied the trainee and put down the phone. Actual Instruction Labels: - ON PACKAGING FOR A "ROWENTA" IRON: Do not iron clothes on body. - ON "BOOTS" CHILDRENS' COUGH MEDICINE: Do not drive car or operate machinery. - ON A HAIR DRYER: Do not use while sleeping. - ON A BAG OF FRITOS: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. - ON A BAR OF "DIAL" SOAP: Directions: Use like regular soap. - ON A FROZEN DINNER: Serving suggestion: Defrost. - ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP: Fits one head. - ON TESCO'S TIRAMISU DESSERT: Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.) - ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. - ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR: Not to be used for the other use. - ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. - ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING: Product will be hot after heating. - ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID): Warning: may cause drowsiness. - ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE: Warning: keep out of children. - ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS: For indoor or outdoor use only. - ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS: Warning: contains nuts. (Xcuse the language) Have a nice weekend everyone! Oliver
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