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You know you're a railfan when... ...you haven't had the above incident with silver, but only because you pride yourself on having a complete set of railroad flatware ...you also have a matching set of china ...if it wasn't in that same railroad's cookbook, you won't eat it ...you see a picture of Milwaukee Road 261's cab, and wonder, "how can they keep that locomotive so clean and shiny" ...it then inspires you to go polish up the steam locomotive in your back yard ...your collection of books is like the Library of Congress--for the United States of Railroadia ...your four cardinal directions aren't north, south, east, and west, but instead are Leland Stanford, Collis P. Huntington, Mark Hopkins, and Charles Crocker ...your car has no accelerator, but mysteriously has a large metal lever extending from the center of the dashboard, oops, backhead ...if you slam on the brakes hard enough, a red light on the hood starts flashing ...you can't take your car to rail yards anymore, because the crews mistake it for a locomotive ...your house bears an uncanny resemblance to LA Union Station ...you learned how to pronounce Sault St. Marie after studying the SOO Line ...you don't say Milwaukee Road, SOO Line, Nickel Plate, and Rock Island, but instead their full names ...you can compute tractive effort, factor of adhesion, and minimum horsepower per train, for practically anything on rails, but still can't figure the tip in a restaurant ...you carefully compare the new K-Line mikado to your own USRA light mikado in your back yard Hope you had a laugh, Daniel
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