The new and (not very) improved humor thread

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Posted by CShaveRR on Monday, March 30, 2020 11:16 PM

I remember the distinctive milk trucks our dairy used to use--they'd put it in an insulated box outside our door.  I think our standing order was a quart bottle of homogenized (orange cap), and a quart of separated milk, which Mom would sometimes mix up, otherwise skim off the cream when cream was needed for coffee, etc.

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Posted by Semper Vaporo on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 8:38 AM

I remember that insulated box!  It was free from one company (Borden, I think), but we had milk delivered every day.  Mon/Wed/Fri by one compamy and Tue/Thu/Sat by another and both used the same box.  I don't remember which company delivered which days, but they were Borden and Polk.

Somewhere I may have the little ladle that just fit the top of the milk bottle to skim off the cream... even the bottle had a bulbous neck designed for the cream to collect in, so the ladle could get it.

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Posted by 54light15 on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 9:25 AM

Here in Canada older apartment buildings have a built-in milk box in the wall at every apartment. A door in the hallway and a door in the room. These are all permanently fastened shut but a lot of buildings still have them. 

Speakng of home delivery, we used to get huge cans of potato chips delivered by Charles Chips. My parents only did it for a short time but we kids sure loved them. I saw one of the cans in a used furniture store not long ago and told the owner of the store about that and she didn't believe me at first. 

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Posted by alphas on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 2:00 PM

Charles Chip cans are now collector items (but they don't cost that much in Central PA as we still have a lot of them around).   

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Posted by zugmann on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 2:10 PM

alphas

Charles Chip cans are now collector items (but they don't cost that much in Central PA as we still have a lot of them around).   

 

Then there were "loose" UTZ  chips you could buy at market when I was a kid.  People look at me funny when I talk about them -  But they'd be laid out under heat lamps at a market stall, and you'd buy them by the pound and they'd put them in wax-lined type bags. 

Lot of homes in my town still use their metal boxes for milk as porch decorations.  We used to have several small and larger dairies around until a Botulism outbreak put a bunch of them out of business (or so I was told - it was a little before my time). 

Kind of funny how we're going back towards that business model. 

 The opinions expressed here represent my own and not those of my employer or any other railroad, company, or person.

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Posted by BaltACD on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 2:36 PM

alphas
Charles Chip cans are now collector items (but they don't cost that much in Central PA as we still have a lot of them around).  

Charles Chips also sold pretzels in cans - Loved them!

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Posted by tree68 on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 3:57 PM

alphas

Charles Chip cans are now collector items (but they don't cost that much in Central PA as we still have a lot of them around).   

Seems like there was a fellow selling Charles Chips who did a route that brought him by my aunt's lakeside cottage.  It's been a few years.

An uncle worked at a chip factory that packaged chips for several lines.  They all came in the same box, only the printing was different.

Supposedly, one of the quality control items was standing on a sealed bag of chips to see if it would hold.  And you wondered why it's so hard to open them...

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Posted by BaltACD on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 4:22 PM

Seems as if Charles Chips had similar issues as the model industry, after the original founders were no longer a part of the business.

 

A long view of names we recognized in our youth.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Chips

 

Both are a testament that if you know the 'niche' in the marketplace you product(s) fill you can make a profitable enterprise - if someone thinks 'one size fits all' with business principles - hello bankruptcy court.

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Posted by tree68 on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 4:51 PM

BaltACD
Both are a testament that if you know the 'niche' in the marketplace you product(s) fill you can make a profitable enterprise - if someone thinks 'one size fits all' with business principles - hello bankruptcy court.

Alas, the phenomenon usually takes one of two courses.  One, a competitor buys the company out, takes the good and ditches the rest.  The other, a "holding company" buys the company out, cleans it out, and dumps the empty shell.

In either case, it's probably an "offer too good to refuse."  And in some cases, the company was about to disappear anyhow because the sole proprietor was going to retire as it was.

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Posted by 54light15 on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 5:18 PM

I built model kits from all 3 companies as I imagine a lot of us did. I read an article about Aurora 1/72 scale airplanes like a Messerschmitt 109 molded in yellow plastic. The idea was to bring them on a picnic or whatever, give them to the kids to build (and to keep them quiet while the adults relaxed) and then blow them up with firecrackers. Which I did.

I did build a model of the liner SS United States (I don't recall the maker) and it was fairly simple in that there were no propellors or rudder, actually not much of anything below the waterline. It was years later that I found out that the lower hull was a military secret. Firecrackers did that one in too. 

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Posted by BaltACD on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 5:47 PM

54light15
I built model kits from all 3 companies as I imagine a lot of us did. I read an article about Aurora 1/72 scale airplanes like a Messerschmitt 109 molded in yellow plastic. The idea was to bring them on a picnic or whatever, give them to the kids to build (and to keep them quiet while the adults relaxed) and then blow them up with firecrackers. Which I did.

I did build a model of the liner SS United States (I don't recall the maker) and it was fairly simple in that there were no propellors or rudder, actually not much of anything below the waterline. It was years later that I found out that the lower hull was a military secret. Firecrackers did that one in too. 

Recall building the USS Missouri from one of the suppliers as well as numerous air plane and other models.

What I found interesting is that the makers varied the scale of whatever was being modeled would fit into a standard box.

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Posted by tree68 on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 7:20 PM

BaltACD
What I found interesting is that the makers varied the scale of whatever was being modeled would fit into a standard box.

I have a "complete" fire department in 1:25.  Partially complete - one of these days I'll finish them up.

The bigger challenge will be a steam fire engine.  Very involved kit.

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Posted by 54light15 on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 7:56 PM

Balt- that's the same thing with Matchbox cars- they were only scaled to fit the same size box. I see them on people's train layouts and it always bugs me because they're not HO scale. Which means that there aren't enough accurate road vehicles available in HO, not the right kind. I know this is off topic but I recall a photo of George Sellios' HO layout in Model Railroader a few years ago. It's a run down New England city set in 1930. On one street is a painted-to-look-rusty Mercedes 540K roadster which came out in 1934. Credibility blown! Where's the Model Ts, the Plymouths, the Hudsons and Nashes? I'll stop now before I turn this into a rant. 

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Posted by Semper Vaporo on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 8:19 PM

I have assembled one of the "Christie 1911 American Steam Fire Engine Antique Model".  Nice easy kit as far as the plastic assembly goes, but the decals were a bear to put on and get straight, even and where they belonged.

 

https://picclick.com/Christie-1911-American-Steam-Fire-Engine-Antique-Model-333347297241.html

 

 

Semper Vaporo

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Posted by tree68 on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 10:18 PM

Semper Vaporo
I have assembled one of the "Christie 1911 American Steam Fire Engine Antique Model". 

It's in the box in a closet, along with the "Firefighter" fire boat...

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Posted by Paul of Covington on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 10:38 PM

54light15
The idea was to bring them on a picnic or whatever, give them to the kids to build (and to keep them quiet while the adults relaxed) and then blow them up with firecrackers. Which I did.

   I hope you mean the models, not the kids.

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Posted by 54light15 on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 11:04 PM

Uhh... yeah I meant the models. If the kids was gonna be blowed up I wouldn't be here. But it was sure fun blowing up plastic models. That's where most of my model cars went. 10 year old boys and firecrackers are not a good mix. It's always fun until somebody loses an eye as one of my aunts used to say. 

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Posted by Semper Vaporo on Tuesday, March 31, 2020 11:10 PM

tree68
 
Semper Vaporo
I have assembled one of the "Christie 1911 American Steam Fire Engine Antique Model". 

Semper Vaporo

Pkgs.

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Posted by Deggesty on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 8:41 AM

As to model airplanes, General Mills would send you a model on paper which you cut out, glued together, and put a penny in the nose to balance it properly--and they flew as you sent them through the air. You had the option of sending two cereal boxtops or one boxtop and 5c for each one. As I recall, you could get USA and enemy planes.

Johnny

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Posted by 54light15 on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 10:10 AM

In the U.K. at train shows there are always vendors that sell Kitmaster model locomotives, mostly British types, but there are some from other countries like the Swiss Krockodile electric all In OO scale. I have a paper model of the SS Normandie that is a reproduction of one that you could buy in the 1930s by sending in box tops. It's not exactly an accurate scale model but what the hell. 

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Posted by Flintlock76 on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 10:53 AM

Thanks so much for that Aurora-Revell-Monogram history Balt!  Very interesting and brought back quite a few memories.

I built a load of WW1 aircraft models as a kid since I was fascinated by the era, and Revell were my go-to kits.  The quality was top-notch.  I also built quite a few Airfix kits as well, they had a good variety of WW1 types.  The quality wasn't quite as good as Revell, but more than acceptable.  And Airfix did WW1 tanks, which Revell didn't.  

I never really cared for ship or tank models much, with the exception I've mentioned, so didn't do much with them.  

The only Aurora models I remember doing was the "Dracula" figurine and a model of the "Seaview" from "Voyage To The Bottom Of The Sea." 

I don't remember doing any Monogram models at all.  

And you are so right with your comment about "one size fits all" management.  If you don't understand the business you're in you're heading for trouble irregardless of how many degrees you have.  The real world isn't quite like they imagine it in business schools. 

Come to think of it, the real world isn't like it's imagined in a lot of places.  When I was at The Basic School for Marine officers in 1975 someone stuck up a gag gravestone in the shrubbery:

"Here lie the bones of Lieutenant Jones who attended this institution.

He died one night in a fire-fight while attempting 'The School Solution!'"

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Posted by 54light15 on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 11:11 AM

I buitl models from all the companies. Monogram had some very fine classic car models, two of which I still have. Airfix for ships and early WW2 aircraft- that was my interest, the last military biplanes and early monoplanes. Auroras I found to be kind of crude but did build a few of their aircraft.

One model I built probably 50 years ago is the Bugatti Royale from Lindberg. I saw the actual car at a show in Michigan; it belongs to the Henry Ford museum. When I got home I compared the photos I took of it to the model and that model is pretty damned accurate. Of course it's a little beat up now after moving house several times but it's in a case about 2 feet away from me as I write this.

I used to have a 1/8 scale model Citroen Traction Avant from the French Heller company but at over 1,000 parts it was too much for me so I sold it on Ebay. Besides, I had a real one to play with. 

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Posted by York1 on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 11:11 AM

Neat video, Balt.

I did not build models from any of the three companies.

I made mostly model cars from the AMT company.  This was in the 1950s, so I don't know if that company even exists anymore.

York1 John       

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Posted by 54light15 on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 11:13 AM

I can assure you that AMT is still alive. There is a hobby shop that I visit that has shelves full of them. I wish the Hubley company was still around. I have ten of their metal classic cars and they are really fun to build and take a fair bit of craftsmanship to do right and to me look great. I have one to be built yet whenever I have time. 

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Posted by tree68 on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 11:31 AM

54light15
I can assure you that AMT is still alive.

Seems like AMT and ERTL are now one and the same, as I recall.

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Posted by Flintlock76 on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 11:38 AM

If any of you veteran modelers are heading to the North Jersey area, (although obviously not in the immediate future considering current events) stop in at Ridgefield Hobbies in Ridgefield NJ.  The place is a treasure trove of plastic models of all types, plus model railroading merchandise as well. 

Here's an amateur video shot in January 2019.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9z_1ZDjz48  

I was in there myself not long afterward and the place is stunning!

Here's a vid from 2010.  Things haven't changed too much.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_6ChZ3iwao  

The place is a time machine!  You might just find that thing that eluded you years ago!

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Posted by Overmod on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 12:12 PM

54light15
I can assure you that AMT is still alive.

I think the situation is that AMT (the Michigan company that made promotional models for automobile companies before 'branching' into plastic model kits) is gone, but many of their molds remain and are in use for production now.  The same is true of the "MPC" in Mount Clemens, and the old Revell that made the plated parts that wouldn't stay plated.

I welcome new production of many of these old 'favorites' -- one of the more recent being the remarkably good IMC Cougar II and Dodge semi-truck tractor cab kits.  

Still perhaps the most evocative model I can remember was the original 'demonstrator' model of the Hubley Duesenberg SJ that I saw as a child in an Englewood toy-store window.  It had been painted two-tone green, and I particularly remember the apple-green engine block and applied red plug wires.  I then read, I think in the back pages of Boy's Life, that if you sold xx number of boxes of greeting cards for a particular company, they would send you as a reward one of these kits -- I dutifully went up and down most of the streets in my then neighborhood in Tenafly selling those cards ... which to this day I remember as being very fine cards ... by twos and threes to anyone I could charm with young salesmanship.  Duly got my kit, had my father help me build it -- it wasn't as great as the demo I remembered, but it was still a delightful thing to make.

Am about to teach my daughter some modeling skills involved with one of these (acquired off eBay) in making custom bodywork, using model ship-framing techniques and veneer 'planking' with inserted brass wire standing in for the screws... perhaps this enforced distance-learning social distance thing is not entirely unfortunate...

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Posted by Overmod on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 12:37 PM

COVID-19 UPDATE TO ANCIENT POST HERE:

New signage for banks: 
Please note that due to COVID-19 restrictions this Bank is closing all branch lobby access effective March 24th, 2020, until at least April 7th.  In the interim, please use our drive-through ATM service, using the carefully-documented procedures outlined below.  Please follow the appropriate steps:


******************************* 
MALE PROCEDURE: 
1. Drive up to the ATM. 
2. Put down your car window. 
3. Insert your ATM card into the machine.  Leave it inserted if it has a 'chip', otherwise withdraw it when requested.  Enter your banking PIN on the keypad when prompted. 

4. Select the function desired, enter any amount required, and then follow the onscreen prompts. 

5. Remove any cash dispensed, then retrieve card and receipt from machine. 
6. Please exit the lane promptly so that other customers may use the system, but remember that all transactions are final once you leave the drive-through lane. 


******************************* 
FEMALE PROCEDURE: 
1. Drive into ATM lane.  Reverse and realign as necessary if hung up or bumpers contact structure. 
2. Reverse and back up the required distance to align car window with the machine. 
3. Set parking brake carefully, then put driver's window down. 
4. Find handbag, deploy contents to passenger seat to locate ATM access card. 
5. Please tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up for the duration of your transaction(s). 
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.  You may open car door to allow easier access to machine due to  excessive distance from the car. 
7. Open car door to retrieve dropped card from pavement.  For assistance blow horn twice and wait.
8.. Insert card, leaving it inserted if equipped with chip or withdrawing when prompted to do so. 
9 Re-insert card the right way when prompted and repeat above action. 
10. Dig through pile from handbag to find diary containing PIN (probably on the inside back page or other coded location). 
11. Enter PIN. 
12. Press cancel to re-enter correct PIN  Repeat as necessary until correct. 
13. Enter transaction type, and amount of any cash required for withdrawal, using the keypad or screen controls. 
14. Check makeup as needed in mirrors while deposits are processed or cash is disbursed. 
15. Retrieve cash and receipt. 
16. Consult handbag pile again to locate wallet, and place cash inside. 
17. Carefully write withdrawal amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook. 
18. Re-check makeup. 
19. Drive forward several feet. 
20. Reverse back to cash machine. 
21. Retrieve card. 
22. Retrieve card holder from handbag pile and return card to proper slot.  Be sure to return pile to handbag at this time, to avoid loss of items between and under seats while driving. 
23. Give dirty look to drivers who may be waiting behind you -- they should learn patience in these difficult times. 
24. Restart stalled engine
25. Redial person on cell phone, then pull out of lane, avoiding curbs and barriers... 

26. Drive for 2 - 3 miles or until prompted by visual or olfactory reminders. 
27. Release parking brake.

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Posted by 54light15 on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 2:11 PM

Overmod- I built both Hubley Duesenberg kits and I have to say, that mine are museum-worthy! Not bragging, they are impressive to everyone that sees them and mine are better than any others that I've ever seen. And yes, Duesenberg engines were all an apple green. I also have all three of their Packard models, a Chevrolet roadster and 3 Model A Fords. One Ford is the station wagon and it was an S.O.B getting the 2-tone wood bits right with constant touching up the two different shades. 

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Posted by Deggesty on Wednesday, April 1, 2020 2:45 PM

Somehow,"FEMALE PROCEDURE: ...." reminded me of the increased number of car wrecks after manufacturers moved the beam lowering/raising switch from the floor board to the steering column--many blondes had trouble reaching the switch with their feet.

Johnny

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