The new and (not very) improved humor thread

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Posted by Overmod on Wednesday, September 25, 2013 5:38 PM

"Carry On Nurse" was started in late 1958 and released in spring 1959.   I have little doubt Hudis adapted the story from the earlier reference... unless, of course, there was in fact a historical truth, complete with names...

I can't take credit for memory; I checked the 'actuality' of the legend on Snopes and then researched a bit from there...

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Posted by zardoz on Saturday, September 28, 2013 7:13 PM

The Top 10 Least Popular Halloween Handouts

  1. Spinach flavored Rice Cakes.

  2. Teeth removing Taffy

  3. Metamucil in a straw

  4. Ex-Lax Brownies

  5. Caramel Covered Zucchini

  6. Colored Crisco on a Stick

  7. Hot steaming bowl of pumpkin guts

  8. Chocolate Covered Prunes

  9. A Handful of Red Man

  10. Anything that ticks!

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Posted by zardoz on Saturday, September 28, 2013 7:24 PM

'Twas the night after Christmas and all through the trailer, the beer had gone flat and the pizza was staler. The tube socks hung empty, no candies or toys, and I was camped out on my old Lay-Z-Boy. 

The kids they weren't talking to me or my wife, the worst Christmas they said they had had in their lives. My wife couldn't argue and neither could I, so I watched TV and my wife, she just cried. 


When out in the yard the dog started barkin', I stood up and looked and I saw Sheriff Larkin. He yelled, "Roy I am sworn to uphold the laws and I got a complaint here from a feller named Claus." 

I said, "Claus, I don't know nobody named Claus, and you ain't taking me in without probable cause." Then the Sheriff then said, "The man was shot at last night." I said, "That might have been me, just what's he look like." 

The Sheriff replied, "Well he's a jolly old feller, with a big beer gut belly, that shakes when he laughs like a bowl full of jelly. He sports a long beard, and a nose like a cherry." I said, "Sheriff that sounds like my wife's sister Sherri." 

"It's no time for jokes, Roy" the Sheriff he said. "The man I'm describing in dressed all in red. I'm here for the truth now, it's time to come clean. Tell me what you've done, tell me what you've seen." 

Well I started to lie then I thought what the hell, it wouldn't have been the first time that I've spent New Years in jail. I said, "Sheriff it happened last night about ten, and I thought that my wife had been drinking again." 

When she walked in from work she was as white as a ghost. I thought maybe she had seen one of them UFO's. But she said that a bunch of deer had just flown over her head, and stopped on the roof of our good neighbor Red. 

Well I ran outside to look and the sight made me shudder, a freezer full of venison standing right on Red's gutter. Well my hands were a shakin' as I grabbed my gun, when outta Red's chimney this feller did run. 

And slung on his back was this bag over flowin'. I thought he stolen Red's stuff while old Red was out bowling'. So I yelled, "Drop fat boy, hands in the air!" But he went about his business like he hadn't a care. 

So I popped a warning shot over his head; well he dropped that bag and he jumped in that sled. And as he flew off I heard him extort, "That's assault with intent Roy, I'll see ya in court." 

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Posted by zardoz on Saturday, September 28, 2013 7:27 PM

A much nicer version:

'Twas the night before Christmas and Santa's a wreck...
How to live in a world that's politically correct?

His workers no longer would answer to "Elves",
"Vertically Challenged" they were calling themselves.

And labor conditions at the north pole
Were alleged by the union to stifle the soul.

Four reindeer had vanished, without much propriety,
Released to the wilds by the Humane Society.

And equal employment had made it quite clear
That Santa had better not use just reindeer.

So Dancer and Donner, Comet and Cupid,
Were replaced with 4 pigs, and you know that looked stupid!?

The runners had been removed from his sleigh;
The ruts were termed dangerous by the E.P.A.

And people had started to call for the cops
When they heard sled noises on their roof-tops.

Second-hand smoke from his pipe had his workers quite frightened.
His fur trimmed red suit was called "Unenlightened."

And to show you the strangeness of life's ebbs and flows:
Rudolf was suing over unauthorized use of his nose
And had gone on Geraldo, in front of the nation,
Demanding millions in over-due compensation.

So, half of the reindeer were gone; and his wife,
Who suddenly said she'd enough of this life,
Joined a self-help group, packed, and left in a whiz,
Demanding from now on her title was Ms.

And as for the gifts, why, he'd ne'er had a notion
That making a choice could cause so much commotion.

Nothing of leather, nothing of fur,
Which meant nothing for him. And nothing for her.

Nothing that might be construed to pollute.
Nothing to aim. Nothing to shoot.
Nothing that clamored or made lots of noise.
Nothing for just girls. Or just for the boys.
Nothing that claimed to be gender specific.
Nothing that's warlike or non-pacific.
No candy or sweets...they were bad for the tooth.
Nothing that seemed to embellish a truth.

And fairy tales, while not yet forbidden,
Were like Ken and Barbie, better off hidden.

For they raised the hackles of those psychological
Who claimed the only good gift was one ecological.

No baseball, no football...someone could get hurt;
Besides, playing sports exposed kids to dirt.

Dolls were said to be sexist, and should be passe;
And Nintendo would rot your entire brain away.

So Santa just stood there, disheveled, perplexed;
He just could not figure out what to do next.

He tried to be merry, tried to be gay,
But you've got to be careful with that word today.

His sack was quite empty, limp to the ground;
Nothing fully acceptable was to be found.

Something special was needed, a gift that he might
Give to all without angering the left or the right.

A gift that would satisfy, with no indecision,
Each group of people, every religion;
Every ethnicity, every hue,
Everyone, everywhere...even you.

So here is that gift, it's price beyond worth...

"May you and your loved ones enjoy peace on earth."

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Posted by samfp1943 on Wednesday, October 2, 2013 2:53 PM

To those of us who are retired, or otherwise unemployed:Smile, Wink & Grin

Yesterday I was at the Local Dillon's Store' (an area South of Wichita, full of Military retirees) Dillon's (our large food chain in Kansas) buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal Lab , Bean , the Wonder Dog, and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.  What did she think I had an elephant?

 
So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again.
 
I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the  hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.  I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.  The food is nutritionally complete, (certified), so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
 
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I had stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.  I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
 
Dillon's won't let me shop there anymore.Whistling

 

 


 

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Posted by zardoz on Friday, October 18, 2013 5:05 PM

Tips for Red Necks

IN GENERAL
1. Never take a beer to a job interview.
2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.
3. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.
5. Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home.

DINING OUT
1. When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup, and pour slowly so as not to "bruise" the fruit of the vine.
2. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.

ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME
1. A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.
2. Do not allow the dog to eat at the table...no matter how good his manners are.

PERSONAL HYGIENE
1. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys.
2. Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money.
3. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman's jewelry and alter the taste of her finger foods.

DATING (Outside the Family)
1. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date.
2. Be aggressive. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the fillin' station bathroom wall two years ago."
3. Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; Others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it is the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.

THEATER ETIQUETTE
1. Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately after the movie has ended.
2. Refrain from talking to characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you.

WEDDINGS
1. Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2. Unless you are the groom, kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot.
3. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance.
4. Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for this special occasion.

DRIVING ETIQUETTE
1. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles; Even if the gun is loaded, and the deer is in sight.
2. When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way.
3. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer.

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Posted by zardoz on Friday, October 18, 2013 5:07 PM

A man had to attend a large convention in Chicago. On this particular trip he decided to bring his wife. When they arrived at their hotel and were shown to their room, the man said: "You rest here while I register - I'll be back within an hour."

The wife lies down on the bed... just then, an elevated train passes by very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she's thrown out of the bed. Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more. Again a train shakes the room so violently, she's pitched to the floor.

Exasperated, she calls the front desk, asks for the manager. The manager says he'll be right up. The manager (naturally) is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true.

"Look,... lie here on the bed - you'll be thrown right to the floor!"

So he lies down next to the wife... Just then the husband walks in. "What," he says, "are you doing here?"

The manager replies: "Would you believe I'm waiting for a train?"

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Posted by zardoz on Friday, October 18, 2013 5:08 PM

An old but still ruggedly handsome Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation. "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

"Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner. Finally, the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking everything so seriously!? I mean, no sex since 1955!?"

Feeling charitable and a little bit drunk, she took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times. Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955!"

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact voice, "I hope not, it's only 2130 now." 

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Posted by narig01 on Thursday, December 19, 2013 5:47 PM
Some humorous lines. http://cs.trains.com/trn/f/111/t/225792.aspx

Thx IGN
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Posted by Deggesty on Saturday, December 21, 2013 11:37 AM

And, there was the rookie brakeman who was told that the engineer had pulled a lung. He started to leave and said he was going for a doctor--until the conductor told him that the engineer had pulled a drawhead out of a car.

Johnny

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Posted by Murphy Siding on Saturday, December 21, 2013 5:26 PM

     Sometimes I'm painfully aware of where Scott Adams gets his material for Dilbert cartoons....


     I needed a protractor at work.  I checked around, nobody else had one either, but they all agreed that it would be handy if we had one somewhere on the premises.

      I was putting on my coat, to drive up the road to Walgreens and buy a protractor, when my boss asked where I was going.  I explained that I was going to buy a protractor, as I needed to order some custom made metal trim, and the fabricator needed to know the angles required.  (He must not have had a protractor either.)  My boss said "I've got one of those plastic,  half-round angle readers.  Can you make that work instead?". 

Thanks to Chris / CopCarSS for my avatar.

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Posted by Semper Vaporo on Saturday, December 21, 2013 6:06 PM

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife turning back and forth, looking at herself in the mirror. 

Since her birthday was not far off, he asked what she’d like to have for her birthday.

“I’d like to be six, again.” She replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park.

What a day!

He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster… Everything there was.  Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.

He then took her to a McDonald’s where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.  Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop and her favorite candy, M&M’s.

What a fabulous adventure!

Finally, she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed, exhausted.

He leaned over his wife, with a big smile and lovingly asked, “Well dear, what was it like being six again?”

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.

“I meant my DRESS SIZE, you idiot!”

The moral of this story: Even when a man is listening, he is still going to get it wrong.

Semper Vaporo

Pkgs.

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Posted by Deggesty on Saturday, December 21, 2013 7:31 PM

Murphy Siding

     Sometimes I'm painfully aware of where Scott Adams gets his material for Dilbert cartoons....


     I needed a protractor at work.  I checked around, nobody else had one either, but they all agreed that it would be handy if we had one somewhere on the premises.

      I was putting on my coat, to drive up the road to Walgreens and buy a protractor, when my boss asked where I was going.  I explained that I was going to buy a protractor, as I needed to order some custom made metal trim, and the fabricator needed to know the angles required.  (He must not have had a protractor either.)  My boss said "I've got one of those plastic,  half-round angle readers.  Can you make that work instead?". 

Murphy, be glad you did not need French curves; that would have really thrown him.

I did make use of such when I was drawing curves to fit the data readings I took in physical chemistry lab. A set cost a bit more than a protractor did.

Johnny

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Posted by zugmann on Sunday, December 22, 2013 12:44 PM

Our new soda machine at the office has a little LED display that was prominently displaying:

ICE COLD!

48 DEGREES F!

I just shook my head and walked away.

 The opinions expressed here represent my own and not those of my employer or any other railroad, company, or person.

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Posted by Overmod on Monday, December 23, 2013 6:17 AM

zugmann

Our new soda machine at the office has a little LED display that was prominently displaying:

ICE COLD!

48 DEGREES F!

I just shook my head and walked away.

This isn't humor.  The machine's defective.  Call the company involved and have them come out and fix it.

Admittedly, the temperature Coca-Cola specifies for these machines isn't EXACTLY "ice-cold" (or you might have fun when you open the can and try to drink some!) but it's within a couple of degrees of 32 F.

It's a big enough 'thing' that you can get the Coca-Cola Company to exert pressure on the local affiliate if it doesn't get fixed stat...

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Posted by zugmann on Monday, December 23, 2013 9:35 PM

Overmod

It's a big enough 'thing' that you can get the Coca-Cola Company to exert pressure on the local affiliate if it doesn't get fixed stat...

It's back to the 30s.  All is well.

 The opinions expressed here represent my own and not those of my employer or any other railroad, company, or person.

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Posted by Murphy Siding on Monday, December 23, 2013 10:09 PM

Overmod

zugmann

Our new soda machine at the office has a little LED display that was prominently displaying:

ICE COLD!

48 DEGREES F!

I just shook my head and walked away.

This isn't humor.  The machine's defective.  Call the company involved and have them come out and fix it.

Admittedly, the temperature Coca-Cola specifies for these machines isn't EXACTLY "ice-cold" (or you might have fun when you open the can and try to drink some!) but it's within a couple of degrees of 32 F.

It's a big enough 'thing' that you can get the Coca-Cola Company to exert pressure on the local affiliate if it doesn't get fixed stat...

  Humor is where you find it.  I laughed.

Thanks to Chris / CopCarSS for my avatar.

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Posted by tree68 on Tuesday, December 24, 2013 1:59 PM

Overmod
Admittedly, the temperature Coca-Cola specifies for these machines isn't EXACTLY "ice-cold" (or you might have fun when you open the can and try to drink some!) but it's within a couple of degrees of 32 F.

In high school I worked in a "party store."  Most of the product sold involved alcohol...

One customer we had drank a certain brand of beer.  We had a cooler for selling loose bottles of beer, and we usually kept a few bottles of that brand on top of the cooling coils.  If the beer wasn't about ready to freeze, it was going to come darned close.

If the bottles didn't come off that coil, he didn't want them.  

Never have figured that out - his first one was probably plenty cold, but after than they would have warmed to the temperature of wherever he kept them - unless he went through his usual six-pack unusually quickly.

LarryWhistling
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Posted by CShaveRR on Thursday, December 26, 2013 8:36 AM

As you may know, some of us have been known to have brushes with the authorities from time to time on the way home after a "social session" out with friends. Well, two days ago I was out for an evening with friends and had several cocktails, followed by some rather nice red wine. Feeling jolly, I still had the sense to know that I may be slightly over the limit.

That's when I did something that I've never done before:  I took a cab home.

Sure enough, on the way home there was a police road block, but since it was a cab they waved it past. I arrived home safely without incident.

This was a real surprise, as I had never driven a cab before, I don't know where I got it, and now that it's in my garage I don't know what to do with it.

Carl

Railroader Emeritus (practiced railroading for 46 years--and in 2010 I finally got it right!)

CAACSCOCOM--I don't want to behave improperly, so I just won't behave at all. (SM)

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Posted by Deggesty on Thursday, December 26, 2013 11:54 AM

Oh, my, what a problem! Quick! Take it back into town, and find your way to however you got into town in the first place!Laugh

I had a similar, but not quite as drastic, problem when I was a freshman in college. The student who waited the table where I usually ate lunch and supper apparently liked to watch me eat (one night, after supper she asked me if my father had been a millionaire), and would bring me a soup bowl of the dessert after I had finished the small bowl that was the standard serving. One night, the dessert was pineapple-upsidedown cake--and I was not able to eat the large bowlful then. I did not want to waste it--but the only people who were allowed to take food out of the dining hall were those who had care of anyone in the infirmaries (one to a dormitory). I managed to get it out without anyone such as the Dean of Women's seeing me (she probably would have called to me, or, at least, spoken to me about it later). My problem was, of course, getting the empty bowl back to the dining hall without being noticed while carrying it. I was successful. 

Johnny

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Posted by Paul_D_North_Jr on Thursday, December 26, 2013 9:55 PM

Overmod

zugmann
Our new soda machine at the office has a little LED display that was prominently displaying:

ICE COLD!

48 DEGREES F!

I just shook my head and walked away.

This isn't humor.  The machine's defective.  Call the company involved and have them come out and fix it.

Admittedly, the temperature Coca-Cola specifies for these machines isn't EXACTLY "ice-cold" (or you might have fun when you open the can and try to drink some!) but it's within a couple of degrees of 32 F.

It's a big enough 'thing' that you can get the Coca-Cola Company to exert pressure on the local affiliate if it doesn't get fixed stat...

Reminds me of some lines from the 1964 'dark comedy' movie Dr. Strangelove:

Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Colonel... that Coca-Cola machine. I want you to shoot the lock off it. There may be some change in there.

Colonel "Bat" Guano: That's private property.

Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Colonel! Can you possibly imagine what is going to happen to you, your frame, outlook, way of life, and everything, when they learn that you have obstructed a telephone call to the President of the United States? Can you imagine? Shoot it off! Shoot! With a gun! That's what the bullets are for, you twit!

Colonel "Bat" Guano: Okay. I'm gonna get your money for ya. But if you don't get the President of the United States on that phone, you know what's gonna happen to you?

Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: What?

Colonel "Bat" Guano: You're gonna have to answer to the Coca-Cola company.

From http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0057012/quotes 

- Paul North. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

"This Fascinating Railroad Business" (title of 1943 book by Robert Selph Henry of the AAR)
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Posted by zardoz on Friday, December 27, 2013 9:35 AM

Good one, Carl; it took me a few moments to get it (I love it when that happens!).

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Posted by zugmann on Tuesday, February 11, 2014 4:50 PM

Driving to work last week, I passed an orange sign that read: SURVEY CREW AHEAD

But when I got to them, I couldn't think of anything to ask....

Sorry.

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Posted by tree68 on Tuesday, February 11, 2014 5:00 PM

Headline on a fire-related website:

Raw video & radio traffic: Buffalo firefighters find house fire returning from EMS run

Can't say that I've ever run into encountered a burning house responding on an EMS call, much less returning from one...

LarryWhistling
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Posted by ACY Tom on Tuesday, February 11, 2014 7:41 PM
Reminds me of a slogan I recently saw on a truck belonging to a tradesman --- a plumber, I think. It said "Quality is not an option". Maybe it isn't even optional.
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Posted by Paul of Covington on Wednesday, February 12, 2014 3:25 PM

    Zugmann, your "SURVEY CREW AHEAD" reminded me:  my great aunt, when she saw a sign:

 

              SLOW 

       MEN AT WORK 

  would read it "Slow men at work"

_____________

My mind's made up.  Don't confuse me with the facts.

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Posted by Paul of Covington on Wednesday, February 12, 2014 3:31 PM

 WHY ATHLETES CAN'T HAVE REGULAR JOBS  

1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan' all the kids to copulate me."

2. New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.."

3. And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skin's say: "I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."

4. Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treat us like mens. He let us wear earrings.."

5. Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann: "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like  Norman Einstein."

6. Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh : "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.." (Now that is beautiful)

7. Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height.." And, "You guys pair up in groups of three, and then line up in a circle."

8. Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison: "Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton .."

9. Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes."

10. Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regimen of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning, regardless of what time it is."

11. Chuck Nevitt , North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt. (I wonder if his IQ ever hit room temperature in January)

12. Frank Layden , Utah Jazz president, on a former player: "I asked him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'"

13. Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D: "Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject."

14. In the words of NC State great Charles Shackelford: "I can go to my left or right, I am amphibious."

15. Former Houston Oilers coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips, Phillips responded: "Because she's too ugly to kiss good-bye."

 

Lee Glazier

_____________

My mind's made up.  Don't confuse me with the facts.

  • Member since
    April 2007
  • From: Iowa
  • 3,146 posts
Posted by Semper Vaporo on Wednesday, February 12, 2014 4:00 PM

I always thought it an insult for the city to put up signs that read:

 

      SLOW

Children at play

 

Then there was the fellow I went to school with back in the late 60's that was "sort of" in to the Vietnam war protest movement... but the sign he carried he had stolen from a highway construction site... It read:

 

    END ROAD

CONSTRUCTION

 

Semper Vaporo

Pkgs.

  • Member since
    December 2001
  • From: Sunny (mostly) San Diego
  • 1,803 posts
Posted by ChuckCobleigh on Wednesday, February 12, 2014 10:22 PM

ACY
Reminds me of a slogan I recently saw on a truck belonging to a tradesman --- a plumber, I think. It said "Quality is not an option". Maybe it isn't even optional.

One of the septic pumping companies in my county has a sign on each truck offering "Double Your Load Back if Not Satisfied."

  • Member since
    June 2001
  • From: Lombard (west of Chicago), Illinois
  • 13,515 posts
Posted by CShaveRR on Thursday, February 13, 2014 10:33 AM

I liked the one I saw once:  "A flush beats a full house."

Carl

Railroader Emeritus (practiced railroading for 46 years--and in 2010 I finally got it right!)

CAACSCOCOM--I don't want to behave improperly, so I just won't behave at all. (SM)

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