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Monday Madness . . . . . . . [8D] [:(] [:)] Yeah, it's Monday, starting another week without a day off. [:(] I need all the humor I can get <and then some>. Daily Thoughts Camping Tips Shine a flashlight into one ear. If the beam shines out the other ear, do not go into the woods alone. A two-man pup tent does not include two men or a pup. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck. You can start a fire without matches by eating Mexican food, then breathing on a pile of dry sticks. In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear. The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes excellent kindling. The sight of a bald eagle has thrilled campers for generations. The sight of a bald man, however, does absolutely nothing for the eagle. It's entirely possible to spend your whole vacation on a winding mountain road behind a large motor home. Effective January 1, 2005, you will actually have to enlist in the Swiss Army to get a Swiss Army Knife. In an emergency, a drawstring from a parka hood can be used to strangle a snoring tent-mate. "Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business." Dave Barry
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