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Would you believe..... (a little humor)
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[quote]QUOTE: <i>Originally posted by zardoz</i> <br /><br />The following quiz is designed to measure the *** level of the public: <br /> <br />1. The most erotic experience a woman over 35 can have is: <br />a. having her knees rubbed with sour cream <br />b. simultaneously using the food processor, the blender, and the microwave <br />c. reading a sex quiz <br />d. shopping for shoes <br /> <br />2. When a businessman buys a red Mercedes, he is hoping to: <br />a. acquire a mistress <br />b. attract his neighbor's wife <br />c. preserve his youth <br />d. get a tax write-off <br /> <br />3. A marriage is in trouble when the husband brings home from the video <br />store: <br />a. Kitten with a Whip <br />b. Sex Slaves of New Haven <br />c. Emmanuelle II meets Rocky IV <br />d. The girl who works behind the counter <br /> <br />4. Condoms are not recommended for use: <br />a. before the 15th of the month <br />b. after the 15th of the month <br />c. immediately after sex <br />d. children under 10 <br /> <br />5. Religious families generally have large families because: <br />a. they generally have more children <br />b. they just have natural rhythm <br />c. the Bible forbids television <br />d. they're just lucky <br /> <br />6. The Bible condemns homosexuals because: <br />a. they go to the theater a lot <br />b. they look too much like heterosexuals <br />c. they don't keep two sets of clothes <br />d. it's impossible to determine who should take out the garbage <br /> <br />7. After their 35th birthday, fewer than 10% of women ever achieve: <br />a. multiple orchids <br />b. a satisfactory weight-loss program <br />c. a job that pays as much as a man's <br />d. comfortable shoes <br /> <br />8. It is not uncommon for the average male to worry about the size of his: <br />a. bank account <br />b. piano <br />c. office <br />d. necktie <br /> <br />9. In addition to traditional methods, AIDS can also be transmitted by: <br />a. petting goldfish <br />b. handling chicken fat <br />c. kissing the family dog <br />d. bloody bar room brawls <br /> <br />10. Conception has been known to occur in: <br />a. the ovarian tubes <br />b. eustachian tubes <br />c. the Goodyear tube station <br />d. back seat of a Camaro <br /> <br />11. "Time of the month" refers to: <br />a. ovulation <br />b. undulation <br />c. a new moon <br />d. the weekend of AFC vs NFC championship <br /> <br />12. Testosterone is a kind of: <br />a. Italian ice cream <br />b. testimony given in an Italian court <br />c. umpire in an Italian cricket match <br />d. Italian chicken fat <br /> <br />13. An erogenous zone is an area where: <br />a. women tend to fall asleep <br />b. women tend to develop sudden headaches <br />c. men tend to laugh before the punchline <br />d. it is forbidden to park your rogenous <br /> <br />14. At least 50% of males suffer from premature: <br />a. emasculation <br />b. matriculation <br />c. baldness <br />d. laughter before the punchline <br /> <br />15. Judeo-Christian tradition frowns on: <br />a. premarital sex <br />b. post-marital sex <br />c. the opposite sex <br />d. sex <br /> <br />16. The average frequency of sexual relations is: <br />a. 78.8 megahertz <br />b. 92.3 kilohertz <br />c. 98.4 oyithertz <br />d. depends on how often your wife works late <br /> <br />17. Which is not considered erotic vocabulary: <br />a. doo-doo <br />b. thingamajig <br />c. doggie-woggie <br />d. ***-cat? <br /> <br />18. In your personal experience, sex is: <br />a. overrated but undersupplied <br />b. oversupplied but not overpriced <br />c. over there but not over here <br />d. over <br />[/quote] <br /> <br />LOL that was So good, I had to print it.!
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