Trains.com

Humor inspired by FJ&G's "tricky terms" list

1578 views
12 replies
1 rating 2 rating 3 rating 4 rating 5 rating
  • Member since
    November 2003
  • From: The ROMAN Empire State
  • 2,047 posts
Humor inspired by FJ&G's "tricky terms" list
Posted by brianel027 on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 10:11 AM
Under Dave's posting on "Alumimum and die-cast differences" he had a serious listing of some tricky terms as relating to the post topic. Well, I couldn't resist the urge for a little humor on his little read post.

Maybe if he had titled it "Free Beer: Alumimum and die-cast differences" there might have been a little more action.

And being things are a little slow here - and sometimes on the serious side - I thought a little humor was inorder and worth repeating. Bear in mind folks, my own life has been less than a picnic this past year and it is my faith in God, my ability to appreciate what little I do have and my will to find a laugh in the smallest of things that has kept me going.

So take this in the light hearted way I intend it... why's there's even a jab at myself - being an 027 guy, I'm quite familiar with the 027 jabs...

Postwar Lionel = American made quality
Current Lionel = Chinese made quality
Quality = As long as it is profitable
Profitable = Full retail
Full retail = "You gotta be kidding! Are they outta their minds??"
"I just bought that new engine" = "It's now at a 50% blowout price!!"
Bachmann HO snap track = Lionel FasTrack
FasTrack = Super "O"
Lionel ®™ Corporation LLC = Union Pacfic Railroad ®™
Orange and blue ® = Yellow, red and gray ®
A sucker is born everyday = Greendale Train Set @ $600
027 = Bleech! Kid's trains... arrrgh!
Old Railking = Semi scale
New Railking = Full scale
TMCC = The Union Army
DCS = The Confederate Army
YORK = Gettysburg
Two yearly catalogs = Far too many trains being made
One yearly catalog = That company must be having serious money troubles
MARX tooling = Older K-Line 027 stuff
Older K-Line 027 stuff = New K-Line "S" scale
Early K-Line product = No respect from the scale crowd
Recent K-Line product = No respect from the toy train crowd
Happy customer = "Wow, it worked as it was suppose to right out of the box!"
Unhappy customer = "I returned the loco months ago and now you don't know where it is?"
Lawsuits = Appeals
Appeals = Happy lawyers
Happy lawyers = Happy travel agents booking overseas resort vacations
Victorious lawyers = "Hmmmm, this can't be too darn good for the rest of us!"
None of this makes any sense = "That's a great idea - why didn't I think of that?"
A good laugh = Finding humor in the sad but painful truth.

brianel, Agent 027

"Praise the Lord. I may not have everything I desire, but the Lord has come through for what I need."

  • Member since
    August 2003
  • 6,434 posts
Posted by FJ and G on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 10:38 AM
Brian,

Got some chuckles reading your list.

Extruded aluminum makes me think of beer or coke cans. There's a novelty store down the street that sells bi-planes made entirely of coke cans. The propellers spin with the slightest breeze and can be hung from the ceiling. Air conditioner makes props spin.

ALways thought it would look cool above a toy train layout like Spanky's.

Reg. Railking Scale, and other arbitrary "scale" labels, you need to be a lawyer to figure out what size trains you are getting.

This may not be too humorous to some but I'll give it a shot:

DCS=Apple computer (small following)
TMCC=PC computer (large following)
Conventional=Typewriter (largest following)

Lionel=I dig the name
MTH=I dig the guru
K-Line=I dig affordability
3rdRail=I dig limited availability

Fasttrack owner=see, I can even walk on it
Atlas track owner=get your cotten-pickin feet off my track
Lionel tubular owner=you can hear the train coming if you put your ear up to the holes in the rail.

  • Member since
    November 2003
  • From: The ROMAN Empire State
  • 2,047 posts
Posted by brianel027 on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 11:03 AM
Those gave me a laugh too Dave! Very good.

Sometimes we take ourselves so seriously with our trains... I know, I have too.

So it's good to have a lighthearted laugh, even if there isn't any free beer!

brianel, Agent 027

"Praise the Lord. I may not have everything I desire, but the Lord has come through for what I need."

  • Member since
    April 2003
  • 305,205 posts
Posted by Anonymous on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 11:16 AM
new marx= they are american!?

free beer= happy forumers

diecast= automatic price hightener
  • Member since
    November 2003
  • From: Sandy Eggo
  • 5,608 posts
Posted by dougdagrump on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 2:33 PM
Dave, If the planes are made of coke or beer cans you would need the appropriate rolling stock for whichever plane is over the layout at any given time.
If you run a lot of the milk cars you HAVE to get one of those battery powered flying cows. [(-D]

Remember the Veterans. Past, present and future.

www.sd3r.org

Proud New Member Of The NRA

  • Member since
    August 2003
  • 6,434 posts
Posted by FJ and G on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 2:46 PM
To make them fly a bit fast, like greased lightning, you'd also need to grease da cows.
  • Member since
    April 2003
  • From: Willoughby, Ohio
  • 5,231 posts
Posted by spankybird on Tuesday, August 17, 2004 2:58 PM
This is part of next weeks Sunday Photo Fun



BTW I thought of this before this topic was started.

I am a person with a very active inner child. This is why my wife loves me so. Willoughby, Ohio - the home of the CP & E RR. OTTS Founder www.spankybird.shutterfly.com 

  • Member since
    April 2003
  • 305,205 posts
Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 1:07 PM
QUOTE: Lionel=I dig the name
MTH=I dig the guru
K-Line=I dig affordability
3rdRail=I dig limited availability
Williams=I dig reliving the postwar days of my youth

DCS=No one's trains but Mikes will work
TMCC=Works with DCS
Williams=We doan need no steenking computers in our trains

Tony

  • Member since
    December 2003
  • From: St Paul, MN
  • 6,218 posts
Posted by Big_Boy_4005 on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 6:32 PM
QUOTE: Originally posted by vitabile


DCS=No one's trains but Mikes will work
TMCC=Works with DCS
Williams=We doan need no steenking computers in our trains

Tony




Ain't that the truth!!!

Congrats in advance on the 3 stars. Actually I thought you would have gone over the top already today. You and Bob Nelson (Lionelsoni) were neck and neck last time I looked. [;)] He made it a little while ago.
  • Member since
    April 2003
  • 305,205 posts
Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 9:12 PM
Here are a few of my own:
Three-railer = "You know, I go out to the train tracks, and for some reason they run with just two rails

Two-railer = "Three-rail scale means nothing around here"

G-scaler = "Those gosh-darn rivet counting three-railers!"

Z-scaler = "Let's see here--what'd I do with that coupler spring...."

Kid-with-the-pull-around-train-er = "Those grownups think theyre so smart...but I never have to clean my track!"

See you around the forums,
Daniel
  • Member since
    April 2003
  • 305,205 posts
Posted by Anonymous on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 10:06 PM
QUOTE: Originally posted by Big_Boy_4005

QUOTE: Originally posted by vitabile


DCS=No one's trains but Mikes will work
TMCC=Works with DCS
Williams=We doan need no steenking computers in our trains

Tony




Ain't that the truth!!!

Congrats in advance on the 3 stars. Actually I thought you would have gone over the top already today. You and Bob Nelson (Lionelsoni) were neck and neck last time I looked. [;)] He made it a little while ago.


Elliot:

I've been concentrating on other things. The topics here lately (and on OGR, for that matter) haven't been things I've felt I needed to post on. I've been spending more time on the WoodNET woodworking forums. Different bunch of guys, and I'm learning alot I didn't know about wood & tools.

Tony
  • Member since
    December 2003
  • From: St Paul, MN
  • 6,218 posts
Posted by Big_Boy_4005 on Wednesday, August 18, 2004 10:36 PM
I understand completely Tony. I've been sidetracked, if not totally derailed most of the summer. There's a bit of a chill in the air here, and my mind is starting to come back onto it's ONE TRACK. [swg]
  • Member since
    April 2003
  • 305,205 posts
Posted by Anonymous on Thursday, August 19, 2004 2:30 PM
QUOTE: Originally posted by Big_Boy_4005

I understand completely Tony. I've been sidetracked, if not totally derailed most of the summer. There's a bit of a chill in the air here, and my mind is starting to come back onto it's ONE TRACK. [swg]


Elliot:

I hear ya. I took the middle 2 weeks of July off from work. We didnt' go anywhere, though we did a day trip into the city with the kids to take a ride on the Circle Line. This is a sightseeing boat that circles Manhattan, passing under 21 bridges on the way, and through an Amtrak railroad swing bridge. Well, it turns out that the swing bridge was ou of commision that day, so we couldn't go all the way around the island.

Then our 36" TV died the next week & we had to buy a new one. Bought a Sony this time, and I'm amazed at the quality of the picture. We also got a Nintendo Game Cube for the kids, and I've been playing a lot of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles & Hot Wheels, and now Frogger with my son.

And to think, they go back to school in a couple of weeks.

On another note, here goes Number 500. Along with $2, I can get a ride on the subway.

Tony

Join our Community!

Our community is FREE to join. To participate you must either login or register for an account.

Search the Community

FREE EMAIL NEWSLETTER

Get the Classic Toy Trains newsletter delivered to your inbox twice a month